New York rapper Shyne has penned an editorial piece recalling his days following a 2009 prison release and what kind of post-effects the experience has left on him.
From Shyne’s perspective, serving time in prison was the equivalent of surviving in the streets.
“One light year away from hell, a million miles from where I wanna be. Seems like yesterday I was sittin’ in a federal detention center; no food to eat; going to sleep, one eye shut, to the sound of grown men wailing, too G-d to be put out of their misery. October 27, 2009 is the day I walked outta hell, escorted by federal marshals. Some say prison don’t change you, it makes you worst. Violence, drugs, crooked cops, informants, state pen ain’t no different from the streets. Only difference is the square footage. But I was never in jail because “prison is a state of living not the state of me!” My state of mind and this faith of mine allowed me to be a general and face this time. My moniker’s Shyne but I got the soul of Moses, living proof that the desert grows roses. I’ve transformed, just in case you haven’t noticed, I’m on a level higher than I ever been–I am HIM!!!”” (XXL Mag)
The former Bad Boy artist also recalled the mental agony he experienced from behind bars.
“I remember the pain but I can’t tell you what hurt more… The shackles cuffed so tight my blood couldn’t circulate. The time me and that 6’7″ fool got it in and he was washing me ’til I smashed him in the head with the weight bar! The time my moms said they were going to evict her and I had to beg and borrow because all my millions went to trial and appeal lawyers. Probably ain’t hurt as much as that Friday evening when they said guilty of attempted murder. I could hear my moms’ and grandmothers’ hearts shatter into a billion pieces…What about the pain of listening to the radio wishing that was you performing. The pain of guilt knowing you ruined so many lives. The pain of watching young kids going to trial for multiple homicides. Can’t help but think I caused that. Maybe he listened to one of my songs and started tripping. Nah!!! Poverty and desperation cause that not hip-hop. My music is merely a reflection of obscenity and vulgarity that exists on the ground when politicians and leaders sell their souls to Wall Street and billion dollar industries. But maybe I could’ve done more to help my lil bros. Speaking to them, feeding them. I hate watching a baby serving life in prison. I hate myself for not being on the other side of the b wall to help!!!” (XXL Mag)
The LOX’s Styles P recently talked with SOHH about his past stints in jail.
“I think being in jail sucks. It just sucks, period, because you’re missing out on a lot and plus you’re famous so there’s a lot of attention drawn and with the time you don’t get a lot of peace of mind. With being in jail, you gotta be sure that you get it on your own and kinda struggle for that and then you got your family. First and foremost, you got your family missing you. Your kids, your spouse, your mom, your aunt, your uncle, your cousins, your brothers and sisters, etc, etc and then you got your homies without you. At the end of the day, you’re just missing a lot.” (SOHH Guest Star)
New York rapper Saigon also previously discussed the negative sides of jail.
“This is not rapping sh*t, this is real sh*t,” Saigon said in an interivew. “This is the sh*t n*ggas is going through — jail will eat some n*ggas up. Some n*ggas ain’t scared to go back. I’m scared of jail, n*gga. Shout-out to my n*gga Tru Life, Tru Life, I’m scared of jail. I’ll be the first one to say it, and it ain’t even a violent aspect of it or violence because I can handle myself, but it’s the motherf*cking agony and mental torture of prison. N*ggas don’t know how to — that sh*t is mental torture.” (Amalgam Digital)
Check out some recent Shyne footage below: