Pulse Report: J. Cole Fires Blank Shots, 2 Chainz's 36th B-Day Present Unwrapped, Chief Keef's Gangsta Granny

Friday, Sep 14, 2012 12:15PM

Written by Bulldog Butters

In this week's Pulse Report, we're going to try and decipher who J. Cole recently put on blast, watch what 2 Chainz got for his birthday, give props to Chief Keef's granny and oh SOHH much more!

[Editor's Note: The views expressed in this column do not necessarily reflect those of SOHH]

1. Who Shot Ya?

Can I be honest with y'all for a minute? There felt like nothing major went down this past week. Sure there were the small things like President Obama addressing Nicki Minaj's fake diss and Lupe Fiasco practically kissing and making up with a little boy (Chief Keef), but I had to really have some fun and go outside what was covered on SOHH. And where did my ill-minded adventures take me on the Internet? J. Cole. Personally, I've never seen Cole as a beef or even battle-type rapper but after seeing some new footage of him gracing a stage and firing clear shots in the air? Yeah, I guess you could say my opinion is slightly changing.

It's not necessary to watch this full video. In short, J. Cole hops on stage during Kendrick Lamar's set of the BET Music Matters tour stop in North Carolina and debuts a new verse that's chock full o' subliminals. "The game need balance Woke up this morning to the rumors of n*ggas wildin' Picture me hatin' on a young nigga with talent Album flopped but it's cool, he caked out on his allowance (Smoking Section)

Now let's take a moment and think this through. "Picture me hatin' on a young n*gga with talent. Album flopped but it's cool, he caked out on his allowance." LOL!!!! WHOA! If that wasn't a direct shot at Diggy Simmons I don't know what is. Could there really be anyone else? Diggy's 16, 17 years old, couldn't push any units when that album dropped and is known as Rev. Run's son. But Cole wasn't done, more shots?

"I was out in Vegas Kicks was the latest Bitch was the baddest, her head was the greatest Only one thing I ask of you haters, can't diss a nigga if you got 'em on ya playlist" Anyone else picturing Drake & Pusha T going at it while Drizzy practices his raps in the mirror using his Pusha mic he purchased on eBay? Oh, alright then. All of this could mean absolutely nothing though. It's not the first time a rapper has thrown shots out there with the hopes of attracting attention from whoever. As they say, a hit dog will holler. (Smoking Section)

Now this shot had me scratching my dome for a quick minute. At first I thought he might be going at Canibus given the shots he fired himself on wax but then I really started thinking. Could this be directed at Charles Hamilton? Seems like Charles would be more on his radar than Canibus, right?

2. Birthday Cake

It's no secret that I'm still infatuated with that 2 Chainz and Kanye West "Birthday Song" music video. I watched that clip so many times at my local library that I got my access banned for a month. Word. Well, if they thought that was bad, could you imagine how they'd react to seeing what Chainz got for his 36th (no typo) birthday?


Original Video- More videos at TinyPic

All 2 Chainz wants for his birthday is a big booty ho. And that's just what he got. The rapper, who celebrated his 36th birthday this week, was presented with not one, but two, bootylicious babes during his concert at the House of Blues in New Orleans last night. The women twerked on stage and presented 2 Chainz with a cake while he performed his Kanye West-assisted single "Birthday Song." He posed for a picture before continuing on with the show. "Now that we got that sh*t outta the way," he said. (Rap-Up)

SMH. That's wild. 2 ladies, 2 Chainz.

3. Moment of the Week: Granny Dismantles Chief Keef's Gangster

I have read some pretty entertaining things in my life and I've seen some pretty indescribable stuff as well but in terms of hip-hop, coming across this article on Chief Keef's grandma basically punking him? LOL!!!! Go ahead and chalk this up as one of the biggest moments of the year. EASY. It's one thing if your father or even grandfather vouches for you but when you have to get a lady, especially your grandma, to speak out? SMH. It's bad enough if your grandma is saying that you're a good kid but when she straight up clowns you too? LOL!!!!!!

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"Let's be real, I'm always saying, 'Cut that down, turn that off, that's too loud' when he's doing all that music," Carter said. "And girls is his thing. Girls, girls, girls. I get sick of all them girls." All Chief Keef's bad-boy bluster -- and the police investigation into his gang ties regarding Coleman's murder -- "ain't nothing but bull stuff," Carter said. "How can he be doing all that gang stuff when he's always home and when he's not at home he's out of town with me or his uncle. . . . And where's this gang at? In my kitchen? In my basement? Where they at? In my refrigerator where he go all the time?" Carter said, referring her grandson's regular routine around the house. "Look, I'm granny. That's what they call me and I didn't grow up with none of that mess. That don't go in my god---- house. In fact, Carter said Chief Keef used his new rap star status to steer his older cousins away from a thug's life. "He says, 'You don't have to do what you doing,' " Carter said. "And they say, 'My little cousin pulled me out of the street.' " What rap fans hear in Chief Keef's songs is what he sees around him -- not what he does, she said. And Granny says she's always been tough on her grandson, who she said got kicked out of school for saying "something stupid." "I be on his a-- all the time. I'm on his a-- now," she said. "I tell him, 'Things will not go right if you don't do it right.'" (Sun-Times)

LOL!!!!!!!! If there are any of you that want to vouch for Chief Keef, go ahead, but don't you dare say, "It's his grandma, what else is she supposed to say?" LOL!!!!!! Let's point out some of the biggest clown moments in here. There's the fact that she called everything he talks about, violence in particular, "bull crap." That's wild. Then there's her sarcasm where she says, "Where's this gang at? In my kitchen? In my basement?" LOL!!!!!!!!!!!! How about when she goes off saying, "I'm on his a** now." LOL!!!!!!!!

4. Mrs. Butterworth: Csilla Ray

There's something about blondes that draw my attention. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that A$AP Rocky and Iggy Azalea are allegedly still an item or maybe it's having to see Alex Rodriguez go from his wife to Kate Hudson to Cameron Diaz like it's nothing. Simply put? I want me a blonde wifey. LOL. Well, maybe not really but I started thinking, "If all these doggies are having some fun, why shouldn't I?' I took it a step further by thinking what my ideal blonde chick would look like. She'd have to be stacked and I do mean stacked - top to bottom - and she'd have to at least have some type of personality. I'll save y'all the wonder and introduce you all to a realistic figment of my imagination, Csilla Ray:

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And as always, you know what to expect:

5. Rappers Say The Darndest Things

What a wild week. If you ever wished your favorite rapper would have just shut their mouths, this might have been the biggest week of the year thus far. LOL. Let's start off with French Montana straight up revealing he actually has a wife. HUH? Why would you even let that knowledge get out and then have the audacity to say she was schemin' on the low? SMH. As much respect as I've got for Mos Def, his explanation for why you're, not me, calling him "Yasiin Bey" is laughable at best. I won't take away the beauty that makes up former Mrs. Butterworth Erica Mena, but saying Cory Gunz is the closest thing to Big Pun? SMH. No. No. NO!!!! Speaking of barely no-name artists, what's this fuss about some rapper named Wax airing out Def Jam? If he would have taken Def Jam's suggestions, maybe he'd have a record out and some label paper in his pocket. Wax on, wax off outta here. Lastly, Jay-Z, c'mon son. Downplaying that Occupy Wall Street stuff when you faked like you were behind it last year? Y'all already know, it's time for Rappers Say The Darndest Things.

1. French Montana

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"Man, I couldn't do it; that's why we got separated," French explains. "At first it was smooth, but then as much as people think that money changes you, it's changing them around you. A person ain't gonna treat you the same now that they think that you think you somebody. You around so many beautiful women, that's a conflict too. It's just about finding somebody that understand the game, what you're into. But then on the flip side of the coin, you gotta understand their game, what they into ... There's a flip side to everything. You can't expect to make all this money and not go through problems. You can't expect God to give you everything you want without taking something away."

2. Mos Def

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"I began to fear that Mos Def was being treated as a product, not a person, so I've been going by Yasiin since '99. At first it was just for friends and family, but now I'm declaring it openly," he said in an interview. "When my paternal grandfather passed a few years back, I started to wear a shirt and tie every day, like he did. Michael Jackson's death had a big impact on me, too. Right before the Ecstatic tour in 2009, I began wearing loafers and high-waisted pants. And that's where my look started. ... Hip-hop is the last true folk art. I got involved with Ale et Ange because it represents hip-hop in a way that isn't pandering. It's nice to see something that's elegant, skillful, and raw."

3. Erica Mena

Erica MenaCory Gunz

"I guess you could say Cory Gunz is the Big Pun from my era. But no, no, like I said, I think lyrically, he's insane. I've always been a fan of him and think he's underrated as an artist. He's freaking nuts. It just so happens that yes, he's from the Bronx. I absolutely think [him being with Young Money] will help, I just think his lyrical skills are out there and people need to see more of him. I just really think he's dope."

4. Wax

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"I'd been signed to them for a while, and I've been working on songs. They really wanted me to make a radio single. You know, I gave them songs I thought were singles, but the last batch of songs, they didn't believe in. So they dropped me," he explained in an interview. "They were putting me in with songwriters that were known to make hits. The songs I was making with these people was stuff they would write for some 16-year-old pop star kid. Most of the things they wanted me to do were gay. I just wasn't into it."

5. Jay-Z

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Jay-Z says Occupy Wall Street had a fatal flaw: Its 99 messages. The legendary rapper, in a new interview, says he never threw his support behind the protest movement because he didn't understand what it stood for. "What's the thing on the wall, what are you fighting for?" Jay-Z told The New York Times in a wide-ranging interview. The Brooklyn-born hip-hop king said he made his feelings clear to Russell Simmons, who was a full-throated supporter of the Zuccotti Park demonstrators. "I'm not going to a park and picnic -- I have no idea what to do," Jay-Z said, recalling a conversation with Simmons about joining the movement. "I don't know what the fight is about. What do we want? Do you know?"

***J-E-T-S!!! That's all I've really got to say, doggies. It's only one game and the Pittsburgh Steelers are going to be a real challenge. So we've gotta take it one game at a time but 48 POINTS!? SMH. I'm already thinking Super Bowl-bound. LOL. In other news, Yankees gotta take down those pesky Tampa Bay Rays and get their own play-offs dreams off the ground. The summer is wrapping up, so end it with a bang. I'll catch y'all on Tuesday! --BB***

[Editor's Note: The views expressed in this column do not necessarily reflect those of SOHH]

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