Pulse Report: Game Squeezes Out 50 Cent's Juice, Kanye West's Sex Tape Co-Star's Hotter Than Kim K, Lil Wayne Makes Death Threat

Friday, Sep 28, 2012 1:15PM

Written by Bulldog Butters

In this week's Pulse Report, we've got the juice on Game's latest 50 Cent stunt, find out why Kanye West is better off with his sex tape co-star than Kim Kardashian, laugh out loud at Lil Wayne's death threat and oh SOHH much more!

[Editor's Note: The views expressed in this column do not necessarily reflect those of SOHH]

1. The Game's Changed

I'm not going to lie to you, as much as I dislike 5-0 Cent, I have to respect his Street King campaign. I've purchased a couple here and there, I won't front. There's something about doing good for others that gets me all soft and mushy, so what? LOL. Well, it would only be someone as bi-polar as Game to take that entire campaign and clown it to death. Don't let the Jesus Piece album get you messed up in the head. More religious? Ha!

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"The driver seen me coming & [ran] !!! Now I'm headed to skidrow to give this nasty sh*t to the homeless #JesusPiece," Game wrote on Instagram Tuesday (September 25). (Game's Instagram)

^ LOL! Really, Game? Something tells me that he didn't really rob one of 5-0's SK trucks but that he just went and did a full paint job on one. Why you might ask me? I have no idea at all. It's not even close to an album release date and the most activity Game's been doing lately is on the Madden 13 game. LOL. Despite the implications and big talk, nothing really popped off afterward. My question is, who cares? 5-0 is getting ready to turn 40 and Game's career seems to be way past its prime. Even if he did steal it, do we care that much? LOL.

2. A Stronger, Faster, Better Me

Don't get me wrong, Kim Kardashian is probably one of the baddest things in the rap game right now. (She's dating Kanye West, she's 'in' the rap game right now.) But with this buzz about Kanye West's alleged sex tape co-star out and popping, y'all know I had to mess around and see what was what. And OMG, when a doggy got his eyes on Mony Monn? *SPOILER WARNING: Mony Monn could end up being next week's Mrs. Butterworth, she's THAT serious.* Now I know the politics of the game suggest Kanye West and Kim Kardashian make a power couple but putting all that out the door, looking at them matched up, body to body, Mony's running circles around Kim. I'll let y'all judge for yourself, who's rocking that thing better?

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^ The only argument you can POSSIBLY make is that Mony Monn has some plastic surgery going on b/c that chest and back is a little bit too perfect. Maybe that's what inspired Kanye West's "My Perfect B*tch?" Just saying.... But if there "isn't" any plastic surgery and we're not looking at the bank accounts, then Mony Monn's got this in the bag.

3. Moment of the Week: Lil Wayne's Deposition Tapes

Before we even kick things off, let me be the first to say, LOL!!! As much as I wanted to focus the Moment of the Week on Kanye West's sex tapes, nothing had my stomach hurting more than these clips of Lil Wayne straight up sonning peeps in his deposition videos. Who would have thought the biggest a-hole that we've seen thus wouldn't be Kanye West? SMH.

^ LOL!!!! TMZ is wrong for these, but who's complaining? Too funny. It seems like these might be slightly out of context but from what we can see, why would Lil Wayne have such an attitude for a lawsuit that he's behind? Clowning and dissing this guy does what, exactly? Who cares, still crazy hilarious.

4. Mrs. Butterworth: Paz De La Huerta

If any of y'all are like me, which is probably rare, then you're up on that "Boardwalk Empire" tip. Great acting, plenty of action, excellent story-telling, well-picked actors/actresses and oh yeah, handfuls of naked women in each episode. One of the best under the radar ladies on there has to be Paz De La Huerta. She's thick, tall and kinda reminds me of Jennifer Tilly, right? We don't put a lot of light on the lighter complexions in here, especially in terms of actresses, but Paz definitely has to get some Butterworth love in here. In light of the new season and hope of seeing her flashing body parts once again, here's my toast to you sexy lady:

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Now don't grill me, y'all, but I couldn't really pull off too many "sexy" videos for Paz, so you're going to have to settle for this:

5. Rappers Say The Darndest Things

Some days I really have to scrach my Jets cap and wonder if I have some illicit hidden hatred toward rappers. LOL. Think about it, to put some of my favorite rappers on blast for the simply horrible things they say publicly? LOL. Eh, maybe not. Especially considering my issue this week starts with Ciara talking silly about 5-0 Cent and Chelsea Handler. Ciara, you got heartbroken over Bow Wow, stop gassing yourself up. And no matter how many times I say "PAUSE," this is going to come out wrong. Calling the alleged Kanye West sex tape boring? NO SOUP FOR YOU! Moving on. What about this MySpace relaunch? Somebody hit reset on that. Even though "The Wire" is probably one of my favorite dramas of all-time behind "The Sopranos" and "Breaking Bad," but what Wood Harris said about today's rap? C'mon. Then it's off to Mystikal. At this rate, maybe he should consider doing the adult industry. Literally. LOL.

1. Ciara

"I've always said we were like best friends," Ciara told radio host Big Boy referring to Fif. "We were always best friends. [We're not best friends anymore.] ... I honestly did hear something [Chelsea Handler] said, I'm not going to act like I didn't hear anything but I have to honestly say that whatever she said I supposedly said or supposedly told, I never said. Either she was misinformed or she was creating her own fun thing because she always seems like she's very fun and wild -- so I'm assuming she'd create her own story and break down of it all. ... We don't fight over dudes. I gotta say while you're speaking on it, I did find it very funny though, the things that she was saying. I thought it was interesting that she went there with it."

2. Kanye West

A sex tape featuring rapper Kanye West and an 18-year-old girl is being shopped around to various media outlets and porn distributors, but there's a good chance you may never see it. The problem, according to someone who has seen the tape, is that it sucks. "Saw the Kanye sex tape and I must say, it's actually kind of boring," our insider says, also confirming that Kanye does indeed appear in the video, and recorded the thing himself.

3. MySpace

Veteran social network Myspace is undergoing yet another major redesign, this one focused on a radical new horizontal interface and a focus on photos. Invites are coming "very soon." The redesign is the latest in a series, though the last one, rebranding the site as "My[_____]" and bringing a number of visual updates, was not popular. The property was sold by News Corp to Specific Media in 2011, which brought on Justin Timberlake to head up reinvent the site.

4. Wood Harris

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"We have to be careful not to let the artists get dumbed down because the artists will be the missionary, the message holder, and the activist. But, now, people get famous doing something silly on TV, and they run with that ball. I'm an artist, and I'm not insulting Nene Leakes, but I think more than half of television is reality TV now. I'm friends with Mos Def, we want to talk about something. That's what's gone when Tupac is gone - there's nobody who says, "Dear Mama," there's nobody with his complexity as an artist. I love Lupe, that's my brother, my Chi-Town brother, but he's retiring, and he was retiring before the Chief Keef situation. And that Chief Keef situation is extremely sad. Now they can sell sad. Interscope is selling sad. I don't care what the lyrics say; I don't care for it."

5. Mystikal

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Mystikal is giving music one last shot -- but tells TMZ, if he fails to make another hit on his next album ... HE'S TURNING TO PORN. This is not a joke. Mystikal tells us, he needs to make sure the money keeps coming in ... and if there's one thing he's good at, it's having filthy sex. So porn is his plan b. Which is either crazy ... or perfect -- because Mystikal served SIX YEARS in prison for sexual battery beginning in 2004 after forcing his hairstylist to perform sex acts on him. But Mystikal is undeterred, telling us he already has a history in porn -- winning an AVN award in 2003 for an adult movie he made (he doesn't actually have sex in it though).

***I'm not even going to front, I miss those replacement refs, y'all! LOL. They may have been the only chance my Jets would have pulled out a late-drive win against the 49ers. LOL. I guess I'll keep hope alive and know that even without Revis, we're going to be all right. If the Vikings can take out the 49ers, then maybe we can too, right? LOL. It's been a wild week and with the MLB play-offs around the corner, it's a good time to start investing in blankets, portable heaters and plenty of freezer grub you can throw in the microwave or oven/stove. LOL. G'luck to y'all's sports teams, it's J-E-T-S and Yankees all day! See y'all on Tuesday! --BB***

[Editor's Note: The views expressed in this column do not necessarily reflect those of SOHH]

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