Pulse Report: Lil Wayne's Satanic Horns Exposed, G-Unit's Top 5 Worst Signings, 50 Cent Does It Real Big

Friday, Dec 9, 2011 12:10PM

Written by Bulldog Butters

In this week's Pulse Report, doggies, we try to figure out how demented and satanic Lil Wayne "really" is, look at quite possibly the Top 5 worst G-Unit acquisitions to date, give props to 50 Cent for being on every outlet this past seven days and oh SOHH much more!

1. Devil's Pie

LOL!!! Really, doggies, have we really reached the point where Lil Wayne is having to get those Satan rumors? LOL. This is really so silly but y'all know we had to look at it on here. But before we take a close look at the "accusations," let me point out a few things. For one, the most successful artists always go through these rumors and libel-like situations. Jay-Z and that 666 stuff? Kanye West getting inducted into the Illuminati? LOL. Just ask MC Hammer and he'll swear (literally) that Jay is the devil in disguise. It seems like the more successful a doggy gets, the more he/she has to deal with this stupid stuff. Case in point, Deadest Rapper Alive: The Rise of Lil Wayne and the Fall of Urban Youth. Really, Pastor Jomo K. Johnson? You're really trying to push this???

In 2005 Wayne released his heavily anticipated album Tha Carter 2. Critics and fans wondered what the five-foot rapper was going to do to top his previous album which was being considered his breakthrough record. On his previous outing he gave homage to Jay Z by stating that he himself was "best rapper alive, since the best rapper retired." He obviously looked up to Jay Z as somewhat of a rap icon. He had studied how Jay Z had evolved from his former personification of a drug dealer turned rapper to a mainstream commercial music giant. Jay Z's most classic album 'Blueprint' was followed by a 'Blueprint 2." And now Wayne would release Tha Carter 2 in that same vein of continuation. So with Jay Z gone from the scene the now 23 year-old Wayne would begin to prepare to take the Brooklyn Legend's throne.
While critics were lauding Wayne for his lyrical growth and delivery - Wayne's content was becoming more extremely vulgar and misogynistic with every song. And while vulgarity and rap music have often become synonymous - much of the content on Tha Carter 2 was overtly vile. While some might argue that rapper Eminem had been doing this for the past 5 years in Hip Hop, what made Wayne different was that he was an Africa-American artist who was now becoming mainstream. This meant that unlike Eminem, a mainstream Wayne was introducing African-American youth, (who never listened to the white and much older Eminem,) into seriously dangerous subject matters that they had never been exposed to before. Wayne was a "Generation X'er" or an "Eighties Baby". And now in his attempt to prove that he was the best rapper alive, pulling from over a decade of his Hot Boy persona and his insatiable desire to go mainstream and commercial, Wayne would become the first Rap Rock Star - an extremely talented urban rapper with the bad boy and rebellious appeal of a heavy metal rap star. Wayne had found his niche. He would become the hybrid of both worlds.
There is a hidden factor of Wayne's increased misogynistic lyrics. This is the fact that Wayne was sexually abused as a child. This is the fact that Wayne was sexually abused as a child. Wayne recalls the event in the documentary, "The Carter." In the scene that takes place on the tour bus Wayne asks a 15 year-old member of his record label if he was having sex. Wayne then goes on to disclose his first sexual experience. He tells how when he was only 11 years-old, that Brian 'Baby' Williams commanded a woman at a party to perform oral sex on the preteen. What is even more shocking is that the act is forced upon Wayne in the presence of others. The manner in which Wayne describes this abuse is surreal. In 2009 when he was a guest of the Jimmy Kimmel show, he was asked if the event affected him negatively in his adulthood, Wayne would answer, "Yes it did."...
"It is the testimony of Scripture that Dwayne Carter, as a blatant blasphemer of God, by the promotion of anti-Christian philosophies and principles, through his professed love of acts of disobedience toward God, and by the conduct of his own lifestyle, is under the influence of demonic spirits. And, as being under this influence, he himself is being used by Satan to lead countless millions down a path of deception and destruction. And these millions happen to be urban youth. Lil' Wayne as an unbelieving man is not only under the influence of Satan but he is also involved in demonic occult practices. Those who are involved in this type of practice will fully have interaction with demonic spirits in order to receive some earthly benefits. These benefits are usually money, influence, protection, or revenge. These benefits did not come without costs. The demonic spirits will use that person to promote Satan's purpose which is to deceive man into destruction while desecrating the image of God." (Deadest Rapper Alive)

^ Really, doggies? I almost shutter to discuss this topic b/c it's like the whole trying to convince someone to switch their religion over. I mean, Mase once said, "Rap is the devil," right? But in 2011-2012, we're just going to blame Lil Wayne and call him the devil? SMH. This is a joke at best, doggies. While you'll see something like this and get influenced, the real doggies out there know Wayne is not only a father to numerous kids that he loves to death but a doggy that's worked with artists outside of rap, been a headliner at Grammy and MTV shows and really proved to be more influential and positive than we think. To air doggy out and really single him as the all-mighty evil force in rap, really?

^ SMH. Have your own commentary, doggies, I just wanted to bring this to y'all's attention. I hope y'all are not as gullable as Pastor Jomo K. Johnson thinks. SMH.

2. G-Unot

Let's face it doggies, G-Unit is struggling and bringing in new talent seems like a bright idea but when you factor it, ehhhhh. I hate to use the cliche of "don't add anything to a sinking ship," but the saying is kind of true. What 5-0 Cent is doing with G-Unit seems like what any major league team tries to do during the off-season; bring in new pieces and hope they work. SMH. Let's be honest, OK, how many times has 5-0 made a G-Unit move that's not panned out? Way more than five times, LOL. Honestly, the best move was back in 2003 when Game got affiliated with them and the rest is history. For the doggies who are still unsure of everything I'm saying, LOL, G-Unit's added a new piece in the form of a chick (possibly Mrs. Butterworth-quality) named Precious Paris.

"I've got a new female artist I signed to G-Unit Records, her name is Par-is, Paris, P.$., it's going down, you understand," 50 said in a video. "She's from South Jamaica Queens, flavor. Actually, she's been around for a while. I've known her for quite some time. If you a G-Unit fan and you listen and you heard ['Kitty Kat'], that was actually Paris' performance back then. She actually came and did vocals for us on that [Terminate On Site] record but now she's ready and you're going to see Paris." (50 Cent Music)

^ SMH. Now with that out of the way, it's time to take a peek at Bulldog Butterworth's Top 5 Worst G-Unit Signings. Brace yourself, doggies, this is going to be ugly.

1. Olivia

In 2004, Olivia re-emerged as the first woman signed to G-Unit Records. She contributed vocals to the group's debut album Beg for Mercy and to 50 Cent's The Massacre, including the album's number-one single "Candy Shop". (Wikipedia)

I never got down with Olivia b/c she didn't fit in. Even the "Candy Shop" record didn't make me like her, well, until we saw her knockers at the end. LOL. Now only was the "Twist It" record horrible even with Lloyd Banks, she never really molded in with them. Oh, Game saying she was a man too didn't help. And how does Olivia get dropped in 2007 but didn't even appear on Banks' Rotten Apple album a year prior? SMH.

2. Spider Loc

In September 2004 Spider Loc met rapper Young Buck in Atlanta and performed for him. A week later in Los Angeles, Young Buck introduced him to 50 Cent on the set of "Shorty Want to Ride" video and he performed a freestyle rap. After four months the rapper signed a record deal with G-Unit. (Wikipedia)

This didn't make sense to me. Supposedly Spider was there even when Game was in the mix but if y'all ask me, 5-0 didn't really sign him until things got sour with him and Game, forcing him to need a West Coast rapper. Long story short, it didn't and has not popped for Spider. Even his record on Get Rich or Die Tryin': The Soundtrack gets deleted from my iTunes collection. SMH.

3. Hot Rod a.k.a. Young Hot Rod

In 2006, G-Unit Records signed Young Hot Rod. In the same year, in conjunction with Mobb Deep's Infamous Records, they signed both Nyce and 40 Glocc. In 2007, Mazaradi Fox was also added to the label. It was also highly anticipated that Detroit rapper Trick Trick, would sign to the label, though this deal never came to be. (Wikipedia)

LOL! I knew it was a wrap for that G-Unit movement when Hot Rod and 5-0 appeard on that cover of XXL Magazine. SMH. But I won't lie, that record he had with Mary J. Blige was kinda hot. "You better be eassssssy," LOL. Oh yeah, he's on G-Note Records now. ..... Doggies, G-NOTE!?!?! Oh yeah, he's supposed to be the "pop" doggy too. No bueno.

4. M.O.P.

In June 2005, M.O.P. officially announced their signing with 50 Cent's G-Unit Records, around the same time as Queens rap duo Mobb Deep. 50 Cent is a big fan of the group, and has stated his plans to gain the group more mainstream success. The duo completed a song with 50 Cent which was featured on the Get Rich or Die Tryin' soundtrack entitled "When Death Becomes You." Months after the signing, M.O.P. released a compilation album entitled M.O.P. Salutes the St. Marxmen, consisting of several tracks recorded while the group was signed to Roc-A-Fella. In July 2006, M.O.P released the long-shelved Ghetto Warfare. (Wikipedia)

^ The only reason why Mobb Deep doesn't make this list is b/c they dropped an album, an album through G-Unit, back in 2006. As far as M.O.P.? SMH. OK, so they put out an album but it wasn't through G-Unit and if it was, doggies better hope it wasn't! LOL. My problem with them is they seemed to be non-factors for 5-0 and company. They were like the Eddy Curry of the Unit where you knew they had talent but we never got to see the action. Doggies rode the bench that whole time there. SMH.

5. 40 Glocc, Nyce, Mazaardi Fox (3-Way Tie)

In 2006, G-Unit Records signed Young Hot Rod. In the same year, in conjunction with Mobb Deep's Infamous Records, they signed both Nyce and 40 Glocc. In 2007, Mazaradi Fox was also added to the label. It was also highly anticipated that Detroit rapper Trick Trick, would sign to the label, though this deal never came to be. (Wikipedia)

^ .................. refer to No. 3. SMFH.

3. Doggy of the Week: 5-0 Cent

Yeah, any doggy who knows me knows I give credit when credit is due and over the past seven days, 5-0 Cent had things on lock. Whether it was him just barely missing "STFU" Honors by claiming Lil Wayne is turning into him or giving it up to DJ Pauly D, 5-0 held things down. I was even more impressed by him admitting he wished "Lean Back" was his own record and Run-DMC legend DMC thinking back to the young 5-0, when I was a fan of him. And what the heck, even 5-0 killing that past feud talk with Dr. Dre and saying how much of a legend he is earned him that spot. Give it up doggies, b/c 5-0 Cent is that "Doggy of the Week."

1. We Both Think Alike, Doggy

50 Cent lil-wayne-2011-07-26-300x300.jpg

"He's turning into 50 Cent," Fif said when asked about his thoughts on Weezy. "He's going through that process of being successful, 'til people go, "You know what? Get the f*ck outta here. We don't want you here no more." Because you're successful. ... For me, the music is an artistic choice. I'll say, from the very beginning, that I can care less about a critic or how someone judges me for the actual music. You see, people understand within hip-hop culture that I'm passionate about actually trying to do something different. I want to make a change in a different way. This is about me personally feeling like I wanna mean more after I'm dead, when I'm gone." (XXL Mag)

^ Now in most cases, I would say 5-0 is just blowing smoke out of his you-know-what but I had time to really digest what he's saying. 5-0 is admitting his reign is over and that Lil Wayne is the future, right? LOL. OK, honestly, I think 5-0 is gassing things up b/c saying that Lil Wayne is "just now" getting the level of fame he had when Get Rich or Die Tryin' dropped back in 2003 is just retarded (no offense to any doggy). Not only has Wayne been relevant way before 5-0 even got with Columbia (I'm talking about 1998, Hot Boys, doggies) and it really got intensified around 2006-2008 when this doggy had to release an album called Tha Carter III Leaks just to keep fans from exploding. So no, 5-0, you may have gone too far but we all see what you meant. LOL.

2. It's A Jersey Thing, Doggy

50 Cent dj-pauly-d-2011-08-11-300x300.jpg

"When Pauly came by to see me, they had options. They had several places that they were going, and people that were interested in doing a deal with him. Obviously, the momentum from "Jersey Shore" was spun off into him being the first one to have his own independent series. They're moving places and DJing in front of bigger audiences, and getting ready to make moves internationally, where the DJ is the star, overseas. When I sat with him, I saw the opportunities we could have moving forward, with brand extension and packaging the music...I look forward to it. I call him "the bridge." He's going to be something between what you would get from a DJ Khaled or a DJ Drama and what you would get from David Guetta." (Rolling Stone)

^ Is any doggy really taking this serious? LOL. The sad thing is I have this conspiracy theory. I think every rap label is trying to sign a hot white artist. Look, you got Yelawolf over at Shady Records, Kreayshawn at Columbia/Sony, Machine Gun Kelly at Bad Boy Records and an Italian doggy like DJ Pauly D over at G-Unit/G-Note? LOL. I love 5-0's hunger, just hope this is the cuisine he's looking for.

3. One Lean, Mean Fightin' Doggy Machine

50 Cent Fat Joe

"When I was in the mixtape circuit, there was a lot going on. I was able to take things that I wish I made myself and do 'em over. Now it's not a lot of sh*t out there I would do over. I'm like, Nah, that ain't even it right there. You know what I'm saying? When Black Rob had "Whoa!," I wish that was my record. I wish "Put Your Hands Where My Eyes Could See," by Busta Rhymes, was my record. F*ckin' "Lean Back," I wish that was mine. You see what I'm saying? And you know me and Fat Joe don't get along. You know what I'm saying? But to the culture, when you have those moments... And I'm sure they'll tell you they wish they had "In Da Club" and "P.I.M.P."" (XXL Mag)

^ LOL. Come on, this is a good look, doggies. As much as I hate to admit it, it's good to see 5-0 actually admitting Fat Joe had a hot record back in............2004. LOL. I still remember 5-0 talking wild reckless about Ja Rule's "Clap Back" and how it wasn't really that hot, so to see 5-0 bring up "Lean Back" out of the blue? It's a good look no matter how you see it.

4. Hip Hop Honors Me Too Doggies

50 Cent DMC

"What 50 Cent is doing right now is a good thing. You've got to think about it. 50's generation has had a chance to be educated and given a proper guideline on how to do everything possible within the music industry. By the time 50 got into the game, the music industry had expanded into everything else. When you're dealing with a culture phenomenon, once something becomes commercially popular, the possibilities are endless. What I like about 50 is he's in-tune, if he sees something, he'll go investigate it. People that met 50 said, "If you have a new idea, he'll sit with you and ask you questions about it." Another thing I really like about 50 is when he first came into the game, he said, "Man, I ain't really doing this hip-hop thing just for the culture, I'm doing this to get paid." I've loved 50's honesty from day one. He's different from these cats who will do stuff but won't support the culture. It's one thing to profit from this hip-hop culture and not support it. A lot of cats will go, "Oh, I love hip-hop and I love Big Daddy Kane and I love these guys," so why ain't you showing it?" (SOHH Guest Star)

^ You too, DMC? LOL. I can't hate, when you can get DMC to co-sign anything you're doing, it's saying a lot. There are very few doggies that can vouch for you and nothing else matters. It's kind of like having immunity, temporary in my case, against doggies. Run-DMC and Rakim co-sign you and it's over. You are solidified.

5. The Doc Is Good To Go, Doggy

50 Cent Dr. Dre

"Dre helped me a lot on this record. I went to Los Angeles, was working out there for a little bit. I was working on the Detoxrecords, right. I keep saying to Dre, I'm like, "Yo, you don't have to invent nothing. All they want is a strong version of what you gave last time." They need a new version of that. It's like Sade. She goes away for six years, and then she comes back with a new disc. You go, I love this sh*t! It reminds you of the f*ckin' sh*t that she gave you before she left. There's certain artists that have that luxury. You could go away and still be interesting enough to come for people to want to hear that effort. Dre is like that. As I'm busy telling him that, I go, "Wait, maybe I'm bugging for some of the sh*t that I've been doing." You know what I mean?" (XXL Mag)

^ Personally, I think Dr. Dre is gassing doggies up with this whole need for a vacation from rap. LOL. I get he's been going hard for "27 years" but doggy doesn't tour, doesn't drop new album, hardly does production for current rappers and stays so in-house that you'd think he's literally in-his-house doing his work. LOL. Anyway, 5-0 does make an excellent point. Dre never has to make another album anytime soon and we'll still remember him for the classics.

4. Mrs. Butterworth: Kartie Kitten

Now doggies, let's be honest. What's one of the biggest debates amongst all doggies? Think about it. What's the one thing that always shows a separation between races, friendships and respect? T versus A. LOL. It's the truth and we all know that the old theory was white/Asian doggies liked the "T" and black/Spanish doggies liked the "A" the most, right? LOL. These days, I don't know. We're starting to see more white women with butts that'd even make Coco tight. LOL. I say all of that to say this: Appreciate a woman's lower area a.k.a. their money maker, as we can all see is apparent on Kartie Kitten. SMH. I stay delivering hits to y'all like Derek Jeter.

Kartie KittenKartie Kitten

Kartie KittenKartie Kitten

Kartie KittenKartie Kitten

^ LOL. OK, I'll admit, that last photo has "Granny Panties" written all over it. LOL. Y'all know I am a strong believer in actions speaking louder than words, but in Kitten's case, movement raises more eyebrows than stills. LOL.

Actually, even her YouTube videos are intense, doggies! LOL! I'll let y'all peep on your own. LOL. Enjoy this sweet treat!

5. "STFU" Honors

SMH. One day I'm just going to go "H.A.M." and put so many doggies in here, maybe 20 posts. LOL. There's just too many remarks that make a doggy like me cringe. SMH. I'll skip the fluffy talk and get right to it. Drake, do you really have to get all emo-tional about doggies questioning your Young Money love? SMH. He gets way too theatrical for me to respect. Next up? Fabolous? You're pushing 40 and want to fix the chipped tooth? LOL. Come on doggy, your time has passed and fixing the entire grill won't work, just ask 5-0 Cent. If it wasn't as easily noticeable like with Ludacris or T.I., then maybe. But once the chipped tooth goes, so do doggies respecting your gangster. Ja Rule? SMH. This time next year doggy will have published a book with how much he's talked about jail life. SMH. Then we get RZA. RZA. RZA. LOL. Why can't you just be kinda normal, RZA? You know I love you doggy but you gotta give a regular answer one of these days. LOL! Finally...Slim Thug wanting Kat Stacks back? LOL!!!!!!!!!! In case y'all didn't know it already, it's time for "SHUT THE F*CK UP" Honors!

1. Drake

"I'll tell you, if you ever wake up in the morning and you think Young Money ain't my team, you out of your motherf*cking mind," Drake told a crowd of screaming fans. "I'll tell you that right now. My brother Lil Wayne is all the way in Australia right now but I got my camera on in the back and I just want to let him know how much love me and Hartford got for him, so if you got love for Lil Wayne, make some noise."

2. Fabolous

"I'm going to get all of my teeth fixed soon," Fab told radio host Angie Martinez. "[Even my chipped tooth?] Yup. I am. I'm getting too old to have a chipped tooth in my mouth. [When?] I don't know, I'm just going to shock the world with it. [Ustream?] The whole job? The whole thing? [laughs] This Internet world. They just want everything now. [Maybe a] reality show, 'Fab Gets His Tooth Fixed.' [laughs]"

3. Ja Rule

Ja RuleHandcuffs

"My first n*ght here was crazy inmates screaming, banging, and kicking the doors calling the male CO's b*tch a** n*ggas & f*ggots telling the female CO's how they gonna f*ck em, throwing plates of food out their cells onto the floor LOL. WELCOME TO THE GREEN MONSTER! This type of sh*t would never happen upstate at best you'd be in the box for a month at worst the infirmary. I even got into it wit these stupid n*ggas trying to assassinate my character talkin about I'm snitching to the guards and that I'm getting special treatment. I barked on these n*ggas and set em straight cause as a man there's only so much you can take before you snap. At first I tried to ignore there lil comments until they started talkin sh*t like they gonna kick my door and all this clown sh*t. But the funny thing is when I started screaming on them lettin them know they got the wrong n*gga they got excited it was like that's what they wanted to bring the hood out of me. That's when I realized that I'm dealing wit kids they can't be n*ggas my age cause that would've lead to instant confrontation not instant admiration."

4. Jay-Z

RZA & Jay-Z (Concept)Jay-Z & Beyonce (Baby)

"What can I say? It's hard to tell somebody about their own. A father is not only He Who Fat Her; no, but it's somebody who also furthers. Further the education of others. And if you could do that for your seed, then you doing what you do. You doing the right thing. We grew up without fathers. I'm quite sure he had the same situation as me: father absent. So we turned to the streets, music, and other things for a father," RZA explained. "You get married, and the preacher says, "What God has joined, let no man put asunder." That's impossible. "Asunder" means separate. Our divorce rate is big in our country. The true marriage is the sperm and the egg. Because when those two things combine and form a life, you can't separate. You can't separate your father and your mother out of you. Nor will your children be able to. It's eternally enjoined."

5. Slim Thug

Kat Stacks & Slim ThugSoulja Boy & Kat Stacks

"Man, Kat Stacks, we ended up getting into it before but she ended up being cool," Slim told SOHH. "I used to like Kat Stacks in the way she would trick a motherf*cker. A motherf*cker could see her expose another rapper and he's still going to try and f*ck her and it gets done to him. I enjoyed what she was doing. I enjoyed what she was doing and that's how we ended up getting cool. She tweeted me the other day, as a matter of fact. She was like, 'What's good with it, bro?' and I'm like, 'What's up? You still in jail?' It's crazy. I hope she gets out because I want to see her expose some more rappers and sh*t."

***NBA Back, NBA Back! Forget some wrap-up right here, doggies, the NBA is back! New York Knicks are gonna win that chip! Catch y'all on Tuesday! LOL! --BB***

[Editor's Note: The views expressed in this column do not necessarily reflect those of SOHH]

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