Pulse Report: Ludacris Disturbs Big Sean's Peace, "Love & Hip-Hop" Flirts W/ Porn, Drake's Numbers Don't Lie

Friday, Nov 18, 2011 12:35PM

Written by Bulldog Butters

In this week's Pulse Report, doggies, we find out that Ludacris' newest mixtape is actually a bomb set to explode on any doggy that's in his way, see why "Love & Hip-Hop" should be called "Love & Porn", bow down to Drake's teary-eyed dominance and oh SOHH much more!

1. Back For The Last Time

Ludacris, stop it. Honestly. You're a Grammy-winning, movie-starring, paper-stacking doggy that is good at a lot of things. Be happy. You've put out chart-topping albums, you've done award-winning collaborations and you've probably got a lot more money than Forbes gives you credit for...but there's something that's not right, huh? Drake calls you out, NOT BIG SEAN, and yet you get your feelings hurt? Field Mob has not been hot for a minute and yet you feel the need to air doggies out on wax? LOL. I know, I know, I'm confusing some of y'all regular-working doggies, so let's get to the beginning. Ludacris has been hyping up what we all thought would be an "Ehhhhh" mixtape at best, 1.21 Gigawatts, and the truth of the matter? IT'S HOT!!!!! LOL! Forget what I just said, doggies, it's about time Luda got back on some heated 'ish. Peep this and judge for yourself.

"I'm the truth in this booth and you n*ggas all h*es," Luda raps. "Counterfeit rappers say I'm stealing they flows, but I can't steal what you never made up b*tch/Y'all some duplicate rap cloning n*ggas/I manufacture you h*es put on your makeup b*tch. ... Let me explain, nothing's been new since Big Daddy Kane/Flows'll get recycled, passed around to different names -- Y'all get a couple hit records, make some noise and have the nerve to start shouting?/Who's gassing 'em?/ ... May not like the way I used it, but you know you ain't invent it, boy/Do your research before you make a claim so bogus that's disrespecting pioneers in the game ... 'My Chick Bad' went platinum, still winning motherf*cker!" ("Bada Boom")

^ LOL!!!! Y'all can't lie. I gets down with Big Sean, but Ludacris made some points on "History Lesson" and "Bada Boom." More so with "History Lesson" because when you let the music stop and think about it, well, yeah, Big Sean can't really take credit for the "Super Duper Flow" right? My only issue though is Luda's decision not to say what is what. I mean, are you really that bitter to pass it off when asked if it's directed toward Big Sean/Drake? LOL.

Although Luda doesn't mention names, it is quite obvious he is addressing Drake and Big Sean. When asked about the song this morning on Shade 45's "Sway In The Morning" radio program, Luda didn't reveal who he was going at on the song, but did want all the listeners to know he was only defending himself. "I don't start these things, I finish them," Cris told Sway. Luda also addresses the controversy on "History Lesson," another joint off his 1.21 Gigawatts: Back To the First Time mixtape. On the track, Cris plays snippets of songs from throughout the years, where MCs such as Notorious B.I.G., Method Man, Cam'ron and Q-Tip used the infamous "pause, stop" flow. (XXL Mag)

^ Y'all know Drake kept that "NO COMMENT" rule in effect but Big Sean's Detroit roots wouldn't let him. LOL!

""n*ggas talk sh*t, but that's free promotion!"" (Big Sean's Twitter)

^ LOL!!! Now if you don't call that a subliminal, then I just don't know what you call it. LOL. But it looks like the fun didn't stop there. Luda decided to take out his anger on Field Mob. Well, give any old Jaz-O an opportunity to talk and y'all know he will. Enter: Shawn J. Who? Shawn J!

"I'm pretty sure for a fact he's talking about me on 'Say It to My Face.' That bullsh*t. It's crazy because I did that. This sh*t don't hold no weight -- Gotta look at it like, when you're an artist and doing TV or whatever, I've been sitting at home before watching BET and seen 'So What' ringtone come up on Jamster commercials. And then we weren't getting them checks," Shawn said about Field Mob's 2006 hit. "So it left a sour taste in my mouth. And then it had a whole thing transpire with us anyways...One minute, we were cool as f*ck. I pretty much understood that that's how DTP rocks. They use you for whatever. When Luda ain't got no hit songs, they godd*mn milk you for your sh*t and then move onto the next project. That's exactly what they did. I feel like he a f*ck n*gga. That's how I feel. I know they whole system, I've been around. I've seen how other artists got treated just like that. Some real f*ck n*gga sh*t. So I called him a b*tch, a b*tch a** n*gga." (HHN24/7)

^ I don't know about y'all, but am I the only doggy that's seeing a trend when it comes to DTP? Chingy? Shawnna? Lil Scrappy? Bobby Valentino? Field Mob?

Luda went hard on this mixtape and even though I am messing with it, some of those first points I made are still important to recognize. Doggy's beyond successful and addressing what Drake said a year ago? SMH. And while you're at it, why don't you put together a record going at the ex-DTP members? Doggy went too hard if y'all ask me, but the Bulldog Butters in me is riding with this! LOL!

2. T-N-A

Doggies, if I told y'all I didn't get down with reality shows, I would not be lying to y'all. I don't. Simply said. I think they're bogus at best and staged to the core. BUT, and that's with an extra "t" too, this "Love & Hip-Hop" season two is NO JOKE! LOL! You could have asked for my opinion on "Basketball Wives," "Jersey Shore" or anything else that's out there and I would have given y'all a blank face. But this "Love & Hip-Hop" premiere? LOL!!!!!!!!!! Where's the lube at? I'm WATCHING! I guess it was pretty obvious when doggies were talking about that extended season trailer and how Chrissy Lampkin (Jim Jones' fiancee) put a beatdown on Kimbella (Mrs. Butterworth Alumni), but when the show actually came on?

^ LOL!!! I won't lie, I liked the premiere but y'all can tell from the trailer that this is just not the type of show that's gonna do "Basketball Wives" types of numbers. Maybe I'm wrong, but what they're doing is more porn than reality soap opera if y'all ask me. LOL. Every last one of them chicks could have nude shots leaked and drive the Internet nuts. So when they start fighting and ripping their clothes off???? LOL! I'll let Emily Bustamante explain it:


"The fight was crazy, it was out of control and there were definitely punches landed. It was insane. We really didn't know it was going to happen. It was out of nowhere. It was a crazy moment. I don't condone violence and I never wanted Chrissy to fight anybody, but I do understand that there was a lot of emotion in that room," Emily said in an interview. "She took it personal what [Kimbella] was saying, so it kind of turned from aconversation between me and her to her and Chrissy. It was crazy. [Kimbella] was on the floor, her contacts came out of her eyes, she was completely without clothes on the floor. She was laying out naked on the floor. Her dress went up to her neck. It was so insane and that's just a little bit of it. So, when I seen the scene [with Kimbella] saying, 'I'm still pretty,' I was like, 'Oh my God.'" (XXL Mag)

^ SMH. Doggies, no offense, but these chicks aren't made out for a successful reality show. What are they doing that all of these other shows haven't done? The fighting? Done. The lying? Done. The crying? Done. The violence........?

Fabolous' baby mama Emily Bustamante tells TMZ, the massive blowout between Jim Jones' fiancee Chrissy Lampkin and Juelz Santana's lady Kimbella Vanderhee during Monday'sepisode was the final straw. We're told producers are fed up with all the injuries on set from girl-on-girl violence -- the bloodshed, the stitches -- and have decided to institute an all-plastic policy while camera are rolling ... plastic cups, plastic knives, plastic everything. But it doesn't end there -- we're told each cast member will now be accompanied by a personal body guard wherever he or she goes. (TMZ)

^ Like I said doggies, look at their faces, look at their bodies and look at their aggression. Anyone else thinking what I'm thinking??? P0rn! LOL!

3. Doggy of the Week: Drake

This week was a no-brainer, doggies. For those of y'all that still don't get this section, it's pretty easy. The most-talked-about doggy, the doggy that's burning hot on the Internet, the doggy that's got it goin' onnnnnnnn, well, he/she tends to be "Doggy of the Week" when everything is said and done. This week? No-brainer. Drake. But this week is a little bit more unique than past choices. Something about Drake landing this Bulldog Butters honor is different than other times. I guess you could say I kinda got more respect for him in just seven days. From Drake revealing that he's shook when it comes to freestyle battles to him giving blind loyalty to Lil Wayne, Drizzy was THAT doggy. But it's bigger than just that. Bringing out Machine Gun Kelly in Cleveland? Booooosss! That was a strong move, come on, bringing a doggy that's respected for that Rage 'ish? Even bigger than that was Drake addressing allegedly getting snuffed by Chris Brown. Not just the denial but what Drake said "if" it had happened? LOL!!! Finally, those first-week sales? SMH. Your favorite doggy lost, doggy. Gold in a week? On your SOPHOMORE ALBUM, TOO!?!?!?! Put those hands together and give it up to that doggy they call Drake!

1. Waving White Flags, Doggies!

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"I'm a huge fan of the battle scene. I've always been a fan ofHollow Da Don. Obviously The-Saurus is nasty; Iron Solomon is nasty. I always watch the URL TV battles even though I was really mad at the last one they did because the sound was so bad. But yeah, it gets me excited in the studio, to watch these rappers, to see them rap for a whole different cause. I rap to make albums; I rap to make radio records. But these guys prep for these competitions where my heart would be beating out of my chest if I ever stepped to another guy and I had to battle him [for] three rounds, long-ass rounds with so many raps to remember. So I get very inspired by that, seeing other people doing the same thing but doing it so differently."

^ I can't call it. I feel Drake kept is 100 right there. The fact that for once, a rap doggy isn't popping off and bragging about something he/she knows nothing about? Golden. It was good to see some honesty coming from Drake right here.

2. I Love My Doggy, PAUSE

lil-wayne-drake-2011-10-20-300x300.jpgKanye West & Jay-Z (Concept)

"If I had heard it? No," Drake said in an interview. "Because Wayne's done way more for my career than Jay-Z. Wayne is the reason I'm here. Jay-Z did that for [J.] Cole, that's his artist. Cole's my brother, he's an artist I respect so much but I know he'd say the same thing. We've got bosses. We're just falling in line, doing what we got to do."

^ FYI, doggy was asked if would have spit on that wack "H.A.M." diss record. Sorry doggies, but that loyalty is strong. Although, it's easier to say yes/no "after" the fact. But I like the fact that even with the success, you can think Drake still credits a majority, if not all, of his career to Weezy.

3. I Make Power Moves, Doggy!

Drake's "Club Paradise" tour pulled into Cleveland State University last night (November 12) with a special guest. October's Very Own showed love to C-town by bringing out hometown hero Machine Gun Kelly to perform his single "Wild Boy," raging on stage as Drake did "Headlines." "Ya'll make noise some for Machine Gun Kelly one time," said Drizzy.

^ LOL!!!!! Am I the only doggy that sees this as a power move? Drake knows what he was doing. Come on, it's like when Rick Ross started rubbing elbows with Diddy. Associations mean a lot. Just ask Drake and Serena Williams. Drake and Rihanna. Drake and Nicki Minaj. LOL. Even though MGK is signed to Bad Boy Records, he's got that "Rage Movement" behind him. Drake knows about those first-week sales. Smart move.

4. I Beats Doggies On The Low

PSA (Drake List)Chris Brown

"I respect Chris Brown. I'd like to call myself a friend -- I don't know if I'm allowed to do that," said Drake. "But I definitely didn't get elbowed in my face. Somebody would've got knocked the f--k out."

^ LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I can't lie! LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! FUNNY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

5. Eat My Numbers, Doggies

drake-rihanna-2011-07-28-300x300.jpgDrake (Take Care)

The rapper, whose sophomore YM/CM/Universal Republic album,Take Care, is the follow-up to last year's successful bow, Thank Me Later, will debut at #1 with a sales total between 675-725k.

^ Can any doggy say Sophomore Jinx Myth Is A JOKE!? LOL!!!!

4. Mrs. Butterworth: Roxy Milan

Confesion time, doggies. Back in high school me and my boys, doggies should I say, would have discussions about chicks we'd smash. Y'all know the scenario: lunch room, nachos, soda sippin' and nothing but endless games of Spades for that 30-minute period. LOL. So we'd sit around and talk about the different chicks in entertainment (movies, sports, models). Most doggies would pick some suspect WNBA players and that one blonde haired tennis chick, Anna Kournikova. LOL. But see, while doggies co-signed her, I always picked Serena Williams. SMH. Can y'all believe I had to argue why Serena was my top sports chick pick to doggies that tried to tell me Chyna from WWF was hotter? LOL!!!!!! All those memories out the way, it leads me to this week's Mrs. Butterworth pick. Something about Roxy Milan brings me back to those lunchroom debates. Her thickness, toned up muscles and a fatty that leaves you with no choice but to make Serena Williams comparisons, it should be a no-brainer why she's in here. Doggies, take your marks.....SCROLL!

Roxy MilanRoxy Milan

Roxy MilanRoxy Milan

Roxy MilanRoxy Milan

^ SMH. That should be outlawed. Now if y'all can't appreciate the booty, I mean, beauty, that is Roxy Milan, then y'all are.....hmm.....wack! LOL!

5. "STFU" Honors

LOL!!!! That's what I got to say, doggies. LOL!!!! Let's just jump right into it. This week had plenty of gems, some of your favorite doggies talking that wild stuff. For starters, Mrs. Butterworth alumni Kimbella talking wild greasy like Fabolous ain't THAT doggy. Maybe I watched Game's "Wouldn't Get Far" music video too many times, but the swag coming out of this chick's mouth? LOL!!!! STOP IT. Next up? Look, doggies, I'm really about positivity in hip-hop but when it comes from a FAILED attempt courtesy of Lil B? SMH. His AIDS song? HORRIBLE. Next up is a doggy that I actually kinda respect but just need him to hit that "NO COMMENT BUTTON" these days. French Montana. Doggy is hyping himself up like he's the Cliff Lee in winter 2010 all over again. LOL. Dr. Dre? Vacation? Music hiatus? LOL!!!!! And finally. Trina. Where's your brain, chick? SMH. If y'all didn't already know it, y'all have entered the "SHUT THE F*CK UP" Honors!

1. Kimbella

"Me? No! Why would I ever talk to Fab?," Kimbella said when asked if she got Fab's opinion on the show. "He's a non-factor in my life. He was someone in my past and I don't speak to people in my past. I'm not giving him anymore five minutes of fame. My situation is with my kids and my career, nothing else, so that's where I'm leaving that. ... The reason I signed up to do this is for my fans and people that are interested in me as a personality to see who I am as the real me. I'm very secure in myself, I keep it 100 and I really don't give a f*ck. At the end of the day, I'm going to be me and portray me the way I am. You guys will get to see everything I went through, as far as being surrounded by new women in the industry and them trying to get to know me and just the different things I had to go through."

2. Lil B

"I got AIDS, God d*mn, I can't believe this sh*t," Lil B raps, "Last time I f*cked this white girl, I can't believe that b*tch/It let me think, God d*mn, it was another girl/I got a lot of things in my life, but now I'm into swirl/No protection, I should have used a condom/Instead of trusting these women/I never got tested, I felt fine, I never got sick/Plus I look good/My mom said, 'Keep your d*ck in your pants and you'll be good.'"

3. French Montana

French Montana & Kanye Westrick-ross-french-montana-2011-08-31-300x300.jpg

"Shout out ot everybody who's been showing me love -- It's everybody. I didn't really make a decision yet. But shout out to everybody that's been showing me love. Shout out to Jay-Z, shout out to Kanye, definitely shout out to Puff, shout out to my brother Rick Ross, shout out to Sony, shout out to Def Jam, shout out to Interscope, shout out to everybody. I love everybody, man. I just want to make the right decision and keep the music coming. I'm just focused on the music."

4. Dr. Dre

"These are the next two artists I'm working on, Slim the Mobster and Kendrick Lamar. I think that's when I'm gonna just wrap it up for a minute because I've been working on music for 27 years now and the longest I've ever been out of the studio in 27 years has been two weeks," Dr. Dre said in an interview. "So yeah I feel like I'm gonna take a little bit of a break. I'm never gonna stop music, it's like air to me. So I'mma take a little bit of a break. Enjoy some time with the family til I get that itch to get back in."

5. Trina

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"I don't see what the big deal about it is," Trina said in an interview when asked about Kreayshawn and V-Nasty using the N-word.. "It's a matter of respect, if you're not being disrespectful, if you're not doing it in a racist way...I'm not really the person that cares too much about all that. ... Let's worry about voting for Barack Obama for president again. I don't think the N-word is such a big deal, we've been saying it for years, decades, white, blacks, Hispanic, Jamaican, Haitian, Chinese whatever. It is what it is, we didn't create it, we didn't start it and we're not going to be the last to say it. It's going to continue on and on and on so we just need to focus on what's important."

***I don't know if it's the fact that next week is Thanksgiving or if because Christmas is coming sooner than we think, but this Pulse Report was a lot of fun. LOL. I guess it's because Love & Hip-Hop really put a doggy up on some stuff. LOL. Anyone think that Olivia is gonna get a record deal with a major...EVER? And doggies, y'all can put it down, I'm saying Drake flirts with a million! YEAH! I SAID It! LOL!!!! Other than all of that, any other doggy feel like Busta Rhymes making the Cash Money move is suspect? Aight, it's weekend time doggies, I'll catch y'all on Tuesday! --BB***

[Editor's Note: The views expressed in this column do not necessarily reflect those of SOHH]

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