Pulse Report: Hip-Hop's Whitest Week Ever, Game Apologizes...Again, Jay-Z Keeps The Internet Goin' Nuts

Friday, Aug 19, 2011 12:15PM

Written by Bulldog Butterworth

In this week's Pulse Report, doggies, we take a look at what may have been the whitest week in hip-hop...EVER, Game gets teary eyed and cops an apology plea, Jay-Z keeps the doggies in the pound and oh SOHH much more!

1. White Tyson

Now doggies, calm DOWN. That's first off. I know whenever doggies bring up the color factor whether joking or just trying to make a valid point, there is so much screaming and pouting that a point isn't even heard. So chill! LOL. With that said, realize, even back to the days of Vanilla Ice and Marky Mark, we may have had the whitest week of all-time in hip-hop. LOL. Some good, some bad and some just straight up ugggggggggly! Word to Bubba Sparks! LOL. Really though doggies, where do I even start with this? Buckle in, we are going full throttle! LOL.

1. Miley Cyrus Loves Gucci Mane

"Whoop whoo! GUCCI MANE'S NEW ALBUM IN STORES TODAY!#FerrariBoyz Get ittttt," she tweeted August 10th. (Miley Cyrus' Twitter)

^ Y'all want to know the sad thing about this? LOL. I think she really DOES like Gucci Mane. That's something else, doggies. I guess hip-hop is....winning?

2. Machine Gun Kelly's NYC Bird Game

"New York women: so hot and I can't get any of them," MGK said in an interview. "None of them like me. Here in this office, that girl right there [gestures to an intern], she's pretty hot and hasn't looked at me once. Not once. No interest in me. If I go over there right now, or when she's on break, she's not going to talk to me. I don't know what the f*ck it is. Honestly, I look in the mirror and I'm not the greatest looking kid. But I feel like I can pull an 8. Maybe a 7. I don't approach a 9 in New York. I feel like 7 is do-able. But the 8s hate." (Complex)

^ LOL!!! Big ups to Complex b/c I mess with Machine Gun Kelly. Well, I'm trying to get down with that whole Rage movement. Either way, doggy admitting he can't scoop up these chicks out here is just...sad. I mean, birds? Really MGK? LOL.

3. Amber Rose's Jungle Fever Infection

wiz-khalifa-amber-rose-2011-08-17-300x300.jpgamber-rose-wiz-tat-2011-07-08-300x300.jpg

"We're definitely going to get married and have babies. Not right now because we're still busy and we still want to enjoy each other first. We want to go on vacation, travel and just enjoy each other company, but he's definitely the one. We're definitely going to lay it down and get it done." (Global Grind)

^ SMH. This isn't even a black and white thing. This is just a WEIRD thing. Marriage, kids? Does she know he was born in 1987? LOL. Honestly, I want to see them married just to make some money off my doggies who want to bet they'll stay together "forever." LOL.

4. Gucci Mane Wants Kreayshawn

gucci-mane-2011-08-17-300x300.jpgkreayshawn-2011-06-12-300x300.jpg

"I think she hard," Gucci told SOHH when asked what he thinks about the West Coast newcomer. "She's got it. I seen a couple [of her videos] on the Internet and I think she goes hard. I could see us [hooking up musically] in Atlanta. Definitely. I would love to work with her." (SOHH)

^ Wait, hold on. Does doggy know that Miley Cyrus LOVES him? I'd cash-in on the Miley Cyrus cash cow, Gucci. That Disney money stretches, doggy!

5. Anne Hathaway Spits...Hot Fire

Looks like Anne Hathaway's feline empowerment is leading to some interesting experiments for the Oscar nominee. Stopping by Conan O'Brien's couch this week, Hathaway touched on the fan-and-photographer frenzy around the Pittsburgh set of "The Dark Knight Rises." She's not licking her paws over it. "With all the stuff that's going on with Batman, the paparazzi attention's been a little intense," she said. "So I actually wrote a rap song about it; it's in the style of Lil Wayne." (Los Angeles Times)

^ The day chicks like this start rapping like that? Doomsday. Say your prayers doggies. LOL!!!!

6. Donald Trump Discovers The New Eminem

"A lot of people are calling me about the Mac Miller rap song," Trump said in a video. "Now, it's named 'Donald Trump.' Maybe you should pay me a lot of money, but it just did over 20 million people, tuning into Mac Miller. So in one way, I'm proud of him. I haven't actually seen the [video], it's a little hard to understand on the song itself. Probably, it's not the cleanest language you've ever heard, but this kid is the new Eminem. Everybody says he's fantastic. Let's see what it is. But the 'Donald Trump' song just hit over 20 million, that's not so bad. I'm very proud of him." (From The Desk of Trump)

^ Y'all have NO IDEA how badly I wanted to put this in "STFU" Honors!!

7. The King of Hip-Hop Is...Eminem!?!?!?

lady-gaga-eminem-2011-06-05-300x300.jpgJay-Z (Rolling Stone)

With his dominant album sales, YouTube views and social-media scores, Eminem takes the title as the current King of Hip-Hop. Unlike our Queen of Pop ranking, which Lady Gaga took in a walk, Marshall Mathers's win was somewhat closer - note the fairly tight point range among our top three. (Rolling Stone)

This ain't about race, doggies, but saying Eminem gets the title over Jay-Z, Nas even Snoop Dogg? Nah. That ain't right. You can argue social networking and album sales all you want, but if y'all know anything about HIP-HOP, it's that it didn't start with any of those factors. Party, hype and skill. Get outta here Rolling Stone. Y'all killed yourself on this.

8. David Banner Shocked Over Justin Bieber's Rapping

David BannerJustin Bieber

And what happened, particularly when it came time for Bieber's contribution, took the entire studio by surprise. "I'm very protective of hip-hop, and I would never produce a song if I didn't think it was jamming," Banner shared, "and Justin Bieber floored everybody in the studio." For those questioning the credibility of Shawty Mane's hustle and flow skills, Banner sets the record straight. "When I look at the blogs, people are trying to dust it like: 'Did somebody write it? Was it Pro-Tooled together?' That boy... I actually wanted the very first take. We ended up doing it again, but he spit the whole verse all the way down non-stop. He spit," Banner clarified, explaining that the Biebs is a true student of hip-hop. "It made me feel good because it shows you the effect of [hip-hop] culture. And for him to study and dissect our culture that way... he really has a respect to spend that much time, because that takes practice to be able to spit and rap like that. And I was impressed." (Neon Limelight)

^ SMH. I get it but I don't get it. Get it?

2. Games Over

Cry baby? Junk talker? Liar? Y'all can call this doggy anything and everything you want. This apology officially puts Game in the "STFU" Honors Hall of Fame. I was going to do the whole story wrap-up for y'all but after seeing this, I decided to let Game tell it like it is. CNN. Apology. Game Over.

One would expect a Grammy-nominated rapper as tough of The Game to be unfazed by petty legal issues. But in a surprising turn of events The Game not only apologized, but did so on CNN, with a fake skyline backdrop and everything. This absolutely shatters the stereotypical unapologetic swagger the rap community is notorious for. The Game sounded contrite and genuine in his apology. But it's hard not to laugh at the incongruity of a former member of the Bloods who had once spent three days in a coma due to gunshot wounds apologizing for a Twitter prank on CNN. (Death & Taxes)

^ EXACTLY!!!! Nothing more to say, doggies. Y'all judge for yourselves!

3. Doggy of the Week: Jay-Z

You already saw this one coming, doggies. LOL. It's pretty much a no-brainer. If there is a Jay-Z project out, then you know the media is all over it. Hence, there couldn't have been an easier pick for "Doggy of the Week." It was actually hard to slim this down to the Top 5 things that made Jay that doggy y'all all love to love. I mean, we could just look at the "Otis" music video or see Jay burn that $$$ up in Miami. Talk about bringing the Heat! LOL. Then you got Jay playing Phil Jackson by hyping up his team leader, J. Cole, or just see how much Swizz Beatz feels like working with him and Kanye West is like an extravaganza. Oh yeah, having the hottest album in America doesn't hurt either. LOL. Put those hands together, doggies, and applaud Jigga.

1. Hottest Whip In The Game Gets The Chain, Doggies

Unlike his previous collaborations with West -- the maudlin short film "We Were Once a Fairytale" or the deceptively simple "Flashing Lights" -- with "Otis," Spike Jonze plays it relatively straight. There are the same tracking shots he's used in old Beastie Boys videos, and the blown-out color palette recalls even earlier work like R.E.M.'s "Crush With Eyeliner" or "Electrolite." He's staying true to his roots, which, given the caliber of everyone involved, is an accomplishment in its own right. So while "Otis" might not be what you were expecting, in a lot of ways, it's even more. There's an unabashed joy to it, and there's no denying the power of its singular image, either: slicing and dicing a Maybach (average sticker price: $380,000) is a bold, ballsy declaration, indeed. One that speaks louder than a million boasts. (MTV)

^ Say what y'all want doggies, but the Cash Kings list doesn't lie. You have a couple of the hottest doggies out with the most paper shredding their whip. Not just any whip though, an overpriced Maybach! LOL. Any doggies thinking, "Death of Maybach?" LOL.

2. Money Still Ain't A Thang, Doggies

The rapper and hip hop mogul partied at a Miami nightclub on Sunday night in celebration of his new album with Kanye West, Watch The Throne, and RadarOnline.com has confirmed he dropped a whopping $250,000 on champagne. According to a source close to the Liv nightclub in the Fontainebleau Hotel, Beyonce's 41-year-old husband tipped a generous $50,000 to the waitstaff at the end of the night. (RadarOnline)

NOW THAT'S BALLING! Even though I don't have any idea of what that Miami nightclub is like, I can just imagine it being like the time my boys treated me to all the drinks and games I could consume at Dave & Busters on 42nd Street for my 21st birthday. LOL!!! $250K on drinks? SMH.

3. I Give Indirect Motivational Talk, Doggies

jay-z-otis-vid-2011-08-16-300x300.jpgj-cole-2011-06-21-300x300.jpg

Jay-Z has spoken. The hip-hop tycoon has given his stamp of approval to J. Cole's debut album, calling it a "classic." Jay's protégé had the daunting task of playing the album for his Roc Nation boss. "When I played him the album, I could gauge his response not on what he said, but what his vibe was," Cole exclusively tells Rap-Up.com. "I linked up with [Roc Nation executive] Rich Kleiman and he said he was with Jay-Z later that night. Out of nowhere, Jay said, 'So Cole got a classic. That motherf*cker.'" (Rap-Up)

^ LOL!!! Now doggies, none of my doggies are agreeing with me on this. Here's what I think. I think Jay planned this all out. I think he gave Cole some mixed signs and purposely told Kleiman to tell Cole what he said above, "Cole got a classic. That motherf*cker." Think about it. If your boss doggy believe in you, whether he really does or not, can you imagine what amount of confidence that builds in you? LOL. I'm waiting for a brave enough doggy to interview Jay and ask him if he really believes he has a classic. LOL.

4. I Bring That Old Thing Back, Doggies

jay-z-kanye-west-2011-08-12-300x300.jpgSwizz Beatz

Take a peek at the album's production notes and you'll see Swizz Beatz's name more than twice. Swizz was the mastermind behind "Watch the Throne" banger, "Welcome to the Jungle." Swizz also co-produced "Murder to Excellence" and added additional vocals to two tracks ("Who Gon Stop Me", "Welcome to the Jungle"). "I'm a part of four different songs in different ways," Swizz tells The Juice. "That's like being in the studio with Quincy Jones and Michael Jackson at the same time. Of course we don't feel that now, the masses don't feel like that now, but ten years down the road, 15 years, that will be compared to something like that in hip-hop history. Just to be in the Mercer... I'm just happy to be here." (The Juice)

^ LOL!!! Swizz, calm down, doggy! LOL!!! That's on some next level stuff right there. I might agree to a certain degree that Jay/Kanye in the studio are one of a kind, but to put it up there on the Quincy Jones and Michael Jackson level? LOL. Yeah, Swizzy, you lucked out on not getting put into "STFU" Honors for that line. But who knows, maybe in 15 years I will agree. LOL.

5. More No. 1's Than That Elvis Doggy

Jay-ZKanye West

Grammy-winning rappers Jay-Z and Kanye West's Watch the Throne debuted atop the chart this week at No. 1. According to Nielsen SoundScan, the duo's new LP has sold 436,100 copies in seven days.

^ Do I really need to say anything right here, doggies? Well, I am anyway. LOL. For starters, if you take off a couple tracks like "Lift Off" and "H.A.M.," then Watch the Throne is a CLASSIC. Yes, doggies, I said it. The production is next level, the features limited but superb and I won't lie. This WAS worth the wait. I respect Game for having Dr. Dre on his album but Watch the Throne is the album to beat in 2011 so far.

4. Mrs. Butterworth: Alba Zapata

Doggies, it's that time of the Pulse Report where I have to put all of y'all straight edge doggies on to the hottest of the hot. LOL. Well, maybe the hottest of the week. It's August and I'm still trying to avoid the fact that September is just a couple weeks away. SMH. With that said, doggies, why not keep it exotic and fresh for a little while longer, huh? I'll cut the speech short and let y'all wet your whistles to that luscious sweet thang they happen to call, Alba Zapata.

Alba ZapataAlba Zapata

Alba ZapataAlba Zapata

Alba ZapataAlba Zapata

SMH. D*mn doggies, not having a girlfriend sucks. Well, sucks for y'all. LOL. On second thought, I wonder if my girl has seen these Mrs. Butterworth posts. LOL!!!

5. "STFU" Honors: Game

Doggies, I had to do it. LOL. Even though there are countless amounts of doggies each week that end up in this section, this week goes to the one and only Game. SMH. Only Game could take the time out to kill any respect the average doggy could have for him. LOL! I mean, saying he didn't diss Amber Rose on "Uncle Otis" then saying him, Rick Ross and Beanie Sigel were going to be called "E.S.P.N.?!?!?!" LOL!!!!!!!!!!! Is this doggy serious? If that wasn't enough, doggies, Game has the audacity to call Lil B the wackest rapper of ALL TIME? Nah, say what y'all want about Lil B but doggy spits more fire than Vanilla Ice or Nick Cannon ever has. Even worse? Blaming a tweet on your best friend. SMH!!! And for the cherry on top? "500 Barz." Just stop it, doggy. You ran your mouth too much this week and 23 minutes of rapping just was too much. In case y'all didn't know it, you have now entered the "SHUT THE F*CK UP" Honors section!

1. Game

"How'd I diss Wiz [Khalifa]? I dissed Wiz?," Game asked DJ Envy when asked about his "Uncle Otis" name-dropping record. "I didn't diss her. I said, 'Put the p*ssy on my face and let me taste a little taste.' Now that's a diss? [Envy] said it's a diss. Which one is it? Am I dissing her or is [it disrespectful?] It's just 'Uncle Otis,' man. Blame Uncle Otis. Yeah, he's an old nasty n*gga. Uncle Otis is."

2. Game

"Me, Rick Ross and Beanie Sigel [were going to call ourselves] 'ESPN (Everyday Stacking Paper N*ggas),'" Game told XXL recently in New York. "That's what it is. We entertained doing a group before, but then Rick Ross went crazy with the Maybach Music Group and he signed Meek Mill and all of them. So that reality didn't come to pass. But that's where it was when we did 'Heavy Artillery.' If you can imagine an album with us three."

3. Game

"Number one, wackest rapper of all-time," Game said in an interview. "This is crazy, man. The wackest rapper. Lil B. Lil B. Yeah, he gotta get it because I heard him on [Lil] Wayne's, I heard him on [Wayne's] Sorry 4 The Wait and that was it. I couldn't -- that was it. I never really heard anything else that I can even remember to call it wack but I remember I heard that and that's what it was. So, like, Lil B."

4. Game

game-2011-07-23-300x300.jpgHandcuffs

Game tells TMZ he never authored the tweet in question. Game says he was in the middle of a photo shoot Friday night when a childhood friend of his -- whose Twitter handle is @wackstar -- began going to town on The Game's phone ... typing in five phone numbers and calling people to action. The Game insists his friend had no idea one of the numbers went to the Sheriff's Department. The Sheriffs claim that once their office was flooded with phone calls they asked The Game to call people off -- but Game says he never received the message. As he put it, "They don't have my number and I'm not following the police."

5. Game

"Hov invented swag, I'll give him that/But who invented slime about the niggas in the fitted caps?/Reppin Cincinatti, they ain't ever been there/I'm working the track out, no Under Armour chinwear/Fuck bad bitches, check my list, see Kim there/Stacey Dash, I'll smash and pass/Nut on her face like skin care/Can't get rid of me, the Game gon' be here/Like teachers with they tenure/No pen here, straight off the dome......."

***Good week, doggies! If y'all don't have that Watch the Throne album by now, you're really playing yourself. Even if you got to get a free copy from your doggies or borrow the LP, I mean, even if y'all gotta go to the library to hear it, HEAR IT! Too many doggies are judging it without having even listened to the first few tracks. Nah, that ain't right, doggies. Weather is quietly getting colder over here, so y'all be safe and enjoy these last couple weeks before school starts up. Have some fun, doggies! -BB***

[Editor's Note: The views expressed in this column do not necessarily reflect those of SOHH]

For the latest gadgets, gear and giveaways, check out GetFrush.com.

blog comments powered by Disqus