SOHH Whatcha Think: Does Foxy Brown Deserve $2Mil For Playboy? 3 Ladies Who Should Be Offered Bucks To Get Buck [Click Here & Speak]
Thursday, Jul 21, 2011 12:15AM
If Foxy Brown got offered 2 milli to get naked for Playboy, they must have offered Rihanna her own island. TWO MILLI? That's a milli a t**ty. Not saying the Ill Na Na is lying, but in today's market, those t**ties can't be worth more than three stacks, word to Andre Benjamin.
1998 was a different story. Back then, Brown was fit, fly and flashy. Now? Not so much. Don't get it twisted - if its true, and she decides to pose, I'll right click and save once the pics hit the web. But as far as coughing up $8 bucks for what I can pretty much see in the booklet of her second album - miss me with that.
[Editor's Note: The views expressed in this column do not necessarily reflect those of SOHH.com]
I've never been a subscriber to Playboy. Sure I've seen the Kim Kardashian spread and I know LaToya Jackson posed a couple times when I was a young scrap, but is their target audience even familiar with Foxy Brown? I'd hate for some middle-aged white guy to check his mail, expecting nudes of Pam Grier and wind up getting Fox Boogie huddled up on a Brooklyn stoop rolling a spliff. That's how office shootings pop off, real rap.
For the sake of argument, let's take a budget of 100K and look at some other female artists that'd be better suited to grace the cover of America's favorite spank mag:
Highest bid: 80K
I love Nicki Minaj. I told her I'd admit it. I hope one day she gets naked just to say she f**kin did it. I know I just blew nearly all of my 100K but peep this: Nudes of the Ill Naj Naj would sell like Blue Magic. Real rap.
Highest Bid: $150 dollars and my leftover Monopoly game pieces.
I've already seen the goods, ma. This is my final offer. Peace. Holla back. One.
Highest Bid: 15K
Yeah girl. Go ahead -- drop that top and come get some of this dirty money. Sh*t, I know Diddy ain't payin' you right. First of the month is around the corner, this aint the Pursuit of Happyness. This the real world: Get this cash so you don't gotta dodge the landlord come August. Take that, take that.
Maybe I should be a CEO. Made my offers, and still got $4,850 left to play with. Sheeeeeeit, someone tell Maliah I'm on fiyah, she should work tonight.
Speaking of Maliah, here's a video featuring one of Houston's finest skrippers.
SOHH Whatcha Think - What female artists would YOU pay to grace the cover of Playboy?
[Editor's Note: The views expressed in this column do not necessarily reflect those of SOHH]