Pulse Report: Ladies Hate Cool 50 Cent, Joe Budden's New Beef Lives In Color, Afrika Bambaataa Screams Conspiracy

Friday, Jan 28, 2011 12:30PM

Written by Bulldog Butterworth

In this week's Pulse Report, doggies, we find out why 50 Cent ain't a ladies man anymore, laugh out loud at Joe Budden's latest squabble, induct Afrika Bambaataa into "STFU" Honors and oh SOHH much more!

1. Never Can Say Good-Bye

Doggies, can it all be so simple? Can 5-0 Cent's run with ladies really reached its end? D*MN. I remember it like it was yesterday. Doggy had Meagan Good, Mya, Vivica A. Fox, Gabrielle Union and a grip more back in the day. But to have the money going out of your pocket faster than you can count it, guess the women have decided to follow suit. First lady out the door? The sultry Ciara.

It won't be a lonely Valentine's Day for Ciara this year. The 25-year-old singer has taken a page out of pal Kim Kardashian's playbook and is dating a new NBA baller beau. So who's the guy? And what does E! funnygal Chelsea Handler have to do with the budding romance? Ciara has recently begun seeing 28-year-old New York Knicks star Amar'e Stoudemire. "They're keeping it on the DL, but they are dating," a source tells us of the couple, who just recently took their friendship to the next level about a month ago. According to our source, Ciara, who has been dating rapper 50 Cent on and off for much of last year, officially cut off contact with the hip-hop star when he began hanging out with Handler. "When that Chelsea stuff started, she pulled away from him," adds the source.

^ SMFH. D*mn, 5-0. Back in '07 you was the man, 5-0. What the f*ck happened to you? LOL. Nah, j/k because even though Ciara gave 5-0 his walking papers, at least he was with another chick. I mean, he "WAS" with another chick, so I guess that was g-status. Unless that chick you were with wasn't ever really f*cking with you, right Chelsea Handler?

A source tells the new issue of Us Weekly (on stands now) that Chelsea Handler dumped 50 Cent just before the holidays, leaving the 35-year-old rapper "heartbroken." Determined to win her back, 50 Cent -- who was first spotted canoodling with the "Chelsea Lately" host in October -- "spent Christmas sending her gifts, but she sent them back. She put a note on one that said, 'I can buy my own gifts.'"

^ D*mn. Either that gushy sh*t was like crack or 5-0 was loving the free publicity he got being associated with ol' girl. D*mn. That's just not a good look. I mean, sending gifts and sh*t when this chick wasn't even on you like that? What the h*ll 5-0? What happened to "P.I.M.P?" Maybe in 2011, it's "P.I.M.P.S.T.R.E.S.S.," huh? LOL. Think about it doggies. I mean, d*mn, it's gotten to the point where 5-0 ain't even f*cking with gangster music b/c he's trying to win these ladies' hearts. LOL!!!!

"I think that he was perfect for that," Bobby V said about 50 and their "Alter Ego" collaboration. "He's been doing a lot of songs now. He's not really talking about the 'shoot 'em, bang, bang' as much more now. He's much more on the ladies' side of things now, so I just felt like it was right on that introductory tip for me and him to kind of collab on that kind of song...He heard the record and he was like, 'Man, you know what? I wanna hop on that.' And he did. It came out, he did his verse, he did it real quick and we made it happen."

^ SMFH. Say good-bye to the bad guy, doggies. Say hello to the wannabe sell-out ladies doggy, doggies. SMFH.

2. Spy Vs. Spy

LMFAO!!!! Doggies, much like I did with Game versus Kat Stacks on Twitter months and months back, I'm going to let their tweets speak for themselves and resist from the commentary. But let me just say a thing or two. First off, Joe Budden"S" and Marlon Wayans' beef has to be the funniest dumbest sh*t I've seen since the start of 2011. SMFH. It's like two lames calling each other lame. No offense but it's like, Budden"S" calling Marlon corny as h*ll and then Marlon calling Budden"S" a one-hit wonder just kept going in circles and circles. LOL. What happened to "No Comment," Buddens?

Joe BuddenTwitter

ok, enough is enough, y in the fuck am i still following @MARLONLWAYANS ???? This nigga don't say shit even MISTAKABLE 4 funny, deuces.
NOW @MARLONLWAYANS wanna try & be funny .. if u apologize to me i'll see if i can hook u up w Raz b .. niggaz know how u roll fam, chill
& lets not act like u so fuckin successful @MARLONLWAYANS.. u do stand up at Roscoes, that don't make u funny nigga ...
no need to get all emotional about it tho @MARLONLWAYANS...u just not funny, no disrespect, just truth. stop actin like a bitch.. oh wait
niggaz can't even find @MARLONLWAYANS in B movies tho ... 4real, what in the fuck is he doin that makes him "funny" ?
the funny shit is ... all @MARLONLWAYANS is doing right now is proving my point, smmfh ......
& this is his roast ?????????????????????????????????????? get this nigga @MARLONLWAYANS ALL THE WAY THE FUCK OUT THE PAINT ...
Kim Wayans >>>>>>>>> @MARLONLWAYANS ... just stop man.
just stop fam ... please RT @MARLONLWAYANS Yo @JoeBudden you had to switch yo platinum card for an EBT card. Ol downgrade my status type
u just don't get it do u .... RT @MARLONLWAYANS Yo @JoeBudden yo hat is soggy like wet cereal
sad part is @MARLONLWAYANS thinks i'm tellin jokes or trying diss him .. i could light him up if i wasn't in this stu, i'm just bein honest
ight man, i quit RT @MARLONLWAYANS: Yo @JoeBudden yo brim is floppy like an old dog's ear
Ok, I think I've made up my mind... Might be time to stop by good ol' Benzel-Bush .. #iCare
i can't front, that back & 4th between me & @marlonwayansgot me a cool 5k new followers .... who would've thought.

marlon-wayans-gi-joe-2011-01-28-300x300.jpgTwitter

Really??? Dude who is @JoeBudden ? At this point u are a trivia question on black jeopardy. Can I get a life line?
@JoeBudden I'll kill yo comedy career quock as yo rap career ended 1 and done
Yo @JoeBudden u broke records 4 shortest rap concert 3:25 for your 1 hit song
Yo @JoeBuddenu got @common beard but just plain ol' COMMON lyrics.
Yo @JoeBudden u part of the GONE 2 SOO0n dead career tribute I'm puttin 2gether
Yo @JoeBudden your tattoos r reminders of ur life failures. "Loser, 1 hit wonder, dead on arrival"
Yo @JoeBudden me and my dog play FRISBY w/ yo latest CD.#trash
Yo @JoeBudden look like swizz beats got a nose job and a money reduction
Yo @@JoeBudden if u so successful why u living at mom's crib? Can joey come out to play?
Yo @JoeBudden jay-z's intros be better than your whole anthology
Yo @JoeBudden u are the east coast version of WHOOP THERe IT IS.
Yo @JoeBudden How does it feel that people talkl about you loike you deceased? "What ever happen to joe budden? I think he died"
Yo @JoeBudden yo career is so dead you should endorse CASKETS
Yo @JoeBudden u are the black RICO SUAVE.
Yo @JoeBudden u tour with other 1 hit wonders los del rio (macarena). Right said fred (I'm too sexy). And chumbawumba
Yo @JoeBudden "who let the dogs out"!!! Ring abell#1hitwondersquad
Yo @JoeBudden you are bobby mcfarrin w/ lyrics. "Don't worry be happy" #1hitwondersquad

*DEAD*

^ Even though Marlon had about 35 more wack a** tweets to add on, you gotta admit, his a** was really hurting himself. I mean, WTF? And while I'm at it, G.I. Joe sucked.

3. Doggy of the Week: 5-0 Cent

Yes, doggies. Enjoy it. This may be the only f*cking week where 5-0 Cent gets his due credit for being a real doggy instead of that backstabbing gorilla we all know him as. Doggy had us thinking he really ran the Internet this week. SMFH. I can't even lie on that sh*t doggies. Even better than that is the fact that he still gets support from Eminem on his music even though his punk a** records ain't hot these days. But to top things off and really allow him to become a certified doggy? Getting that d*mn Kool G Rap co-sign. D*mn. WTF? Doggies, Butters included, pay homage to Bugs Monkey 5-0 this week.

1. I Run The Net Doggy

"I don't know why people underestimate me. I just shut downWORLDSTAR for future advertising contact thisis50.com suckers lol," 50 tweeted Monday (January 24).
"I put worldstar to bed, you don't believe try me I will shut your sh*t down. Lol"
"I predict 2 more web sites will shut down this week. Take a guess who they are. I'm sick of the hate I'm to strong."

^ SMFH. Say whatever foul sh*t about doggy and I'll more than likely agree with you. But this week? Sh*t no. Even though this turned out to be 5-0 just running his d*mn mouth and lying, I ain't even gonna lie, I thought 5-0 really shut down World Star Hip Hop and I know I ain't the only one either. LOL. Then again, doggies, doesn't this mean he would have.........snitched? SMFH. D*mn doggy.

2. I Got That White Boy, Doggy

50 Cent stormed Sundance over the weekend to announce his latest film ventures. While there, he also shared some other exciting news, revealing that he's reuniting with Eminem for his next album. "I just flew from Detroit. I'm working with Em on my new album," 50 told a reporter during the Park City festival. The hip-hop mogul has already collaborated with an impressive cast for his fifthstudio album including Lil' Kim, Akon, Swizz Beatz, Busta Rhymes, and Lloyd Banks.

^ Yeah, his sh*t is doing Lox numbers these days but the fact that you can always count on Eminem's lyrical a** to be on an album by 5-0 makes him certified. I mean, d*mn, Em only did one sh*t on Jay-Z's full catalogue of albums and is hand's down Top 10 out of everything, '96 to '03. Applaud this doggy, doggies.

3. I'm A Certified Co-Signed Doggy

"[Lastly], I would have to say 50 [Cent]. I would have to say 50. I mean, 50, he just, at the time he came out, the impact he had on the world, it was like that hardcore street sh*t -- 50 just brought it back. He just put f*cking NY on his back and was like, 'I'ma hold it down, don't even worry about it.' [He] brought that gritty sh*t back to the game. And on top of that, he had a h*ll of a story. If somebody was to write a 50 Cent movie before 50 Cent's life actually unfolded like that, you'd be like, 'Yeah, this is definitely fiction. This would never happen to nobody.' Somebody that get shot nine times, survive that and then blow up and become one of the biggest artists in the f*cking game and kind of corner the market almost d*mn near, the whole world like 'GG-GGG?' [laughs]"

^ SMFH. Doggies, Kool G Rap named 5-0 in his Top 5 of all-time out of Queens, NYC. *DEAD*

4. What's Beef, Doggy?

50 CentCam'ron

"What me and Cam'ron had is music," 50 said, characterizing their rift as a challenge to be the preeminent MC. "It's the competitive nature of the art form. In hip-hop, there's always been battling. It's a part of it. I don't wake up or go to sleep feeling like I hate Cam'ron. He's a good guy."

^ SMFH. I was actually gonna put this sh*t into "STFU" Honors, doggies, but it had me thinking. Has 5-0 finally calmed his wild a** down? Could him saying he's back on cool terms with Cam'ron mean that the reckless sh*t talking, beef videos and bogus a** stunts are finally done with? SMFH. Probably not, but this is a good start anyway.

5. Respect Your Elders, Doggy

50 CentDr. Dre

"I think everyone is," said 50 referring to the project's anticipation, who inked a deal with Eminem and Dre before releasing his acclaimed debut album. "When you got a producer that has that kind of production track record, you even have to credit both Eminem's success and my success to Dr. Dre as a producer," he told MTV News. "My first single off of Get Rich or Die Tryin' -- people constantly tell me it was a classic -- was produced by Dr. Dre, 'In Da Club.' Without that momentum from that song, I'm not sure they would have taken to 'P.I.M.P.' the same way or '21 Questions' or any of the other hit records I released following that."

^ Y'all probably don't remember this, but back in '05, after that Massacre sh*t dropped, 5-0 stayed whining on Dre's a** saying that his time with Game forced Dre to not f*ck with him. I mean, it got to the point where 5-0 said he was only gonna f*ck with Shady Records after his contract was up. I think. So to see doggy actually pay respect to what Dre did to his career and lend support for Detox. Well d*mn doggies, 5-0 might actually give a f*ck these days.

4. Mrs. Butterworth: Sheneka Adams

Doggies, doggies, doggies. Seems like I've gotten a little bit of flack over these past few weeks over my selections for Mrs. Butterworth. One week it's the girl I picked is "too" average, the next week it's an issue of bigger t*ts but no solid a** and then some weeks it's just doggies b*tching. Well, I look to silence all of y'all the h*ll up today with the introduction of the bad a** Sheneka Adams. Besides having some exxxtreme footage/pictures on the 'net, she's a pretty good looker with clothes on as well. Wet your whistles doggies and start thanking me.......NOW:

Sheneka AdamsSheneka Adams

Sheneka AdamsSheneka Adams

Sheneka AdamsSheneka Adams

You doggies still thirsty? Needing a bit more movement? LOL. Yeah, I thought so:

^ I'm batting 1.000, doggies.

5. "STFU" Honors

LMFAO!!! Doggies, wait until y'all see what I have in store for you this week. LOL. Turns out Beyonce is on some "princess" bullsh*t making us believe she would only save that sweet, nasty, that juicy stuff for.....Jay-Z? Then, we got Kim Kardashian's a** really trying to convince every American doggy in the world that she treats white and black c*cks the same. SMFH. But the best "STFU" Honors moment this week doggies may be related to a hip-hop legend straight from my hood but who must be allowing his age to catch up to him. SMFH. If that's not enough, then just imagine a half-way relevant rapper acting like he's not a sell-out......as if any doggy cares and then we end things up with Nicki Minaj inserting Drake's c*ck into her wound. SMFH. Doggies, welcome once again to "SHUT THE F*CK UP" Honors.

1. Beyonce

BeyonceJay-Z

Beyonce claimed she only had two men in her love life and that she never had sex with the first guy. "Though I was too young for it to really be a boyfriend - we didn't live together, we didn't, you know ...," she said about her first boyfriend. "That was my only experience with a guy, and since then I've only had one other boyfriend in my life - Jay...People would be surprised as to the lack of experiences I've had. When I was 12 or 13 I had my first boyfriend, and he was my boyfriend until I was 17. At that age, that was a long time. I've always been very loyal and a little more mature."

2. Kim Kardashian

Ray J & Kim KardashianKanye West & Kim Kardashian

"I really think it's a stereotype. I've dated probably just the same amount of white guys...it's funny I can be with a white guy in the middle of the street making out with him and not one person will say anything or take a picture. I can be standing next to a black guy and all of a sudden, I'm dating him and I don't even know him."

3. Afrika Bambaataa

Afrika BambaataaMC Hammer & Jay-Z (Hellboy)

"Hip-Hop has been hijacked by a Luciferian conspiracy," he says, quite matter-of-factly. "People have used hip-hop in a lot of ways that cause a lot of mind problems. They use the word wrongfully. They use it to mean a part instead of a whole. Like many of these [radio] stations say they're hip-hop, they're playing hip-hop. I go to these stations, and these so-called program directors don't know jack crap about hip-hop culture. They know rap to a certain extent. But I question them. I say, 'Where's your go-go, your hip-house, your electro-funk, your raga, your R&B and soul?' They get real quiet."

4. Talib Kweli

Talib KweliBlogger

"There's a generation growing up that doesn't understand that music is paid, but just because you get it for free doesn't mean that someone's not paying for it," says Kweli. "Someone's still got to pay for it. So you've got to figure, 'Well, how is this person going to pay for it?' You've got to loosen your idea of what selling out is, when you're not participating in supporting the culture."

5. Nicki Minaj

Nicki MinajDrake

"I think they'll definitely have my personality," Nicki explained. "My mother-in-law will be super beautiful, so that's good 'cause Drake's mom is freaking amazing. I love her. They'll have Drake's intelligence, they'll have his sarcastic wittiness that I love about him, they'll have his songwriting skills. I think we'll just make a real creative bunch of kids. Wait, did I just say that me and Drake will make kids? ... I think that would be like incest or something. Do you think they'd be more talented than Jaden and Willow [Smith], if me and Drake really did that?"

***I'm not gonna lie to y'all doggies, still tight over my Jets losing that close one last weekend in the AFC Championship. Gotta go Pittsburgh even though Aaron Rodgers might be the f*cking truth on the Packers. SMFH. Anyway, sh*tloads of snow out here so I'm outtie with a shovel. Catch y'all on the flipside. --BB***

[Editor's Note: The views expressed in this column do not necessarily reflect those of SOHH]

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