Pulse Report: Kat Stacks Gets Smashed, Kanye West Bodies Your No. 1 Rapper, Drake Pulls A "Carter III"
Friday, Jun 4, 2010 12:00PM
In this week's Pulse Report, doggies, we're gonna keep sh*t real d*mn ridiculous after looking back seven days to see why Kat Stacks really "is" a smash hit, bow in the grace of Kanye West, applaud Drake for making the best move of his career...copying Lil Wayne and oh SOHH much more!
[Editor's Note: The views of this column do not necessarily reflect those of SOHH.com]
1. What Goes Around Comes Around
D*mmmmmmmmn, Kat got smashed!!! And not in the way that we all are used to thinking about either, f*ck. There has already been enough f*ckery with doggies talking about this "non-violence to women" and other bullsh*t, so I'm not gonna run your ears about why doggies shouldn't chase/beat-up b*tches. But what we are gonna do is find out what exactly popped off that left Kat Stacks actually telling the truth, kinda, about getting that
a** face smashed in by a couple of goons flunkies. I guess we gotta take that a** all the way back to her saying some sideways sh*t on Twitter.
"yes its true @myfabolouslife sent people today to smack me up at the bar & they stole my phone & recorded it. i dare yall to blast it."
"got my a** wooped? it was 2 n*ggas yelling @myfabolouslife & @bowwow name ... im a female u got 2 n*ggas to hit me LOL lame."
^ Y'all doggies realize this chick is dumb as f*ck, right? Not only did she kill herself by bragging or publicizing the fact that she got snuffed the f*ck out, but she goes ahead and starts daring doggies to let out the footage. SMFH. D*mn, is this b*tch really about making $$$? Because she should have got her Steph Lova on and took this sh*t to the cops, granted, most of them probably realize she's always lying like sh*t, but when it comes to rappers smacking women around, Chris Brown opened a whole f*cking lane for that sh*t, so cops are done looking for thugs riding dirty, they're looking for that next Chris Breezy. LOL. Anyway, so we wait a few days and Fabolous falls into the trap of having to defend his a**, no bullets this time though.
"It's sad y'all believe anything y'all hear & see on the internet.. Especially from someone as credible as Kat Stacks *Smh*"
"Why would I SEND a DUDE to smack a GIRL?? But I know who sent someone to smack her... KARMA!! #RealSh*t."
SMFH...and while we're at it, let's take a look at this alleged A** WHOOPING one more time.
HOLD UP.....not trying to justify these doggies for that wack sh*t, but keep it real, isn't this the same b*tch talking about she's got pistols and she's holding heat?
^ Let's go ahead and put a nail in this sh*t and get Bow Wow to explain why he f*cks with the p*ssy, just not the Kat.
"Of course I had no involvement with it," he promised in an interview. "It's so far fetched for me. Come on, man, everybody knows I make records for girls...I'm not an evil person. I don't condone violence. That's just the type of person I am. I just feel like, if anything, positivity is always the way out. So I think that maybe if she humbles herself a lil more and be positive and go about things differently, then hopefully she'll be alright...but that's not my style. I don't put hits on people, I'm in the music business...if I wanted to fight, I'd be in the MMA."
^ LMFAO!!! Guess so, but at this point, the fact that rappers haven't learned from the Kat Trap is just real d*mn ridiculous. First off, you NEVER respond to the bullsh*t, kinda like how Nicki Minaj does. Rap b*tches keep calling her out and she has yet to name drop any one of them. From the interview sleek dissing to the wack a** "Roger Dat" off-beat freestyles...."silicone shots in ya buttt?" D*mn, that's the best that silicone t*tty model chick had to say? F*ck outta here! Back to the point at hand, Kat got roughed the f*ck up but at the end of the day, from hearing all these weird a** fake groupie stories from her, wouldn't y'all NOT be surprised if she ended up making $$$ off of some bullsh*t kinky sh*t like the "Smack Kat Stacks"-job for a solid $200? LOL. If so, I'm stepping up and going twice. Sad she only gets rappers to really respond to her when she gets beat the f*ck up. LMFAO. P.S.......tell me why the doggies from her drunk video sound and are LIKELY the same ones who planned that bar stunt? Bullsh*t at its best, Kat!!!
2. Power Ranger
Kanye motherf*cking West. You know why me and Ye are cool.....because we're both A**HOLES! That's why we see those wack a** comments, CamronGully, and don't wanna read that wack sh*t no more! LMFAO! D*mn, was it just me or did everyone p*ss themselves when Kanye West's "Power" leaked on the Internet last week? F*ck, that sh*t is not only hardbody but it's gotta be the best sh*t we've heard on the radio since Ye's verse came out on the "Run This Town" sh*t. D*mn!!!! Power? Bulldog? Y'all doggies still lost like that wack a** show that just ended.
....wait, am I bugging? Doesn't this sh*t sound like.....?
"When I first did the 'Power' beat, it was originally intended for a collaborative project that Rhymefest and I talked about doing together, but since he was still working on his El Che project, I never sent it to him," "Power producer Symbolyc One said. "So the beat just stayed on my desktop. One day Rhymefest told me to send him a few beats over and he will try to play a few for Kanye [West]. Originally, I wasn't going to put that 'Power' beat in the beat batch because I used similiar drums as Kanye did on 'Crack Music.' So I was [thinking] he's definitely not gonna pick this one however I sent the beat anyway. Then a couple weeks later I received a text from 'Fest saying, 'Kanye is loving your stuff, he said he's about to change your life.' Two days later I was on a flight to Hawaii to meet Mr. West. The rest is pretty much history."
D*mn, I don't do this type of thing very often, but after reading some dope sh*t over @Complex, I had to post this on the Pulse Report.....for anyone bullsh*tting and not believing me when I say that "Power" is the beginning of the end for your favorite/No.1 RAPPER, LMFAO, your a** better start hoping Taylor Swift drops a diss track......
Miss Info/Hot 97 On "Power"
Wow! Prayer circle claps, motherland chants, rock-n-roll samples, electro-synth, Dwele hooks, plus that kickdrum knock?! As for the lyrics, I love the fact Ye somehow makes 5 stages of loss into a street-to-club-to-stadium banger. Denial, anger, bargaining, sadness, and, finally, 'at the end of the day, goddamnit, I'm killin' this shit.' I tried to maintain my usual cynicism, but this song made me do the Peanuts dance. All day. As for the timing of this 'leak,' it feels so right, I almost wonder if Kanye did it himself. Long weekends, big summer concerts....and a lil' bit of thank me now ; )"
Eskay/NahRight On "Power"
"When this first came on and I heard all of that chanting, I was like, Oh no, what is this shit gonna be. But I'll be damned if it didn't all come together by the time it was over. There were little things here and there that I wasn't crazy about, but since this is supposedly an unfinished leak, I'll reserve judgment. Ye's back on his bullshit though, that's for sure. Somewhere about halfway through the second verse he completely blacks out. His flow on this reminds me of the old, hanging-around-with-Mos-Def flow he used to have rather than the playing-Connect-4-with-Bey-in-Ibiza flow that I was expecting from him on this album. Also, I don't know why, but I was expecting his return-to-rap single to be something slower and more deliberate, like a 'Can't Tell Me Nothing' or something. But I guess that's my bad for thinking Kanye would do what was expected of him."
Elliot Wilson/Rap Radar On "Power"
"Although this premature leak is unmixed, Kanye's 'Power' sounds pretty polished. It's a sonic punch that's soul-searching and stirring. Packed with Mr. West-esque popular idioms ('With some light-skinned girls and some Kelly Rowlands') and moments of reflection ('Goodnight, cruel world, I'll see you in the mornin''), this'll more than satisfy fans fiendin' for a post-autotune return to his rap roots. No Preemo or Pete Rock, newcomer S1 is behind the boards and the King Crimson sample is killer--makin' just one listen an impossibility. Although the suicidal thoughts drenched bridge is a tad disturbing, this is a riveting rollercoaster ride. Welcome back, Mr. West."
3. Get Like Me
Didn't everyone see this sh*t coming? I even remember watching one of this kid's punk a** video's saying he should just leak it all right now but he wasn't going to. LMFAO!!! Drake, who the f*ck are you KIDDING??? I gotta admit, the fact that his album leaked, wait, hold on, does everyone know what the h*ll this is all referring to? D*mn, let me catch every doggy up, turns out Drizzy Wizzy's Thank Me Later "leaked" (LMFAO!!!) onto the Internet this week and poor lil' Canadian Bacon has had to play the defenseless, lonely child with his lip poked out. LOL. He even went on Twitter to sound extra pathetic.
"I gave away free music for years so we're good over here...just allow it to be the soundtrack to your summer and ENJOY! JUNE 15th!"
And if that wasn't good enough, he even did a short interview talking about the "positive" side of things. LMFAO.
"I always said if I had put out an album that was poor quality and music that people didn't enjoy, then I think the leaks would hurt me," Drake said in an interview. "Because a lot of the feedback has been great. The word of mouth, music is something that is to be enjoyed. I think it can help me so, June 15th, I'm still confident."
^ LMFAO!! Get the f*ck outta here Jimmy, and you too Universal. Even though I'm gonna lean a little bit more towards Universal, I still gotta say that Drake knows what's what with this "leak." For the record, this leak was not accidental. Not even by a long-shot. You wanna know WHY this sh*t was not accidental? Rhetorical question, doggies. It's because of this fact right here:
On May 30-31st, 2008, Tha Carter III was leaked internationally. The first of the leaks were distributed on May 30 at around 8pm where five songs from the track list were available on the internet. Hours later on May 31 at 12am-1am the whole album was leaked and posted on various websites for free download.
SMFH......starting to put the pieces to the puzzle together yet, doggies? This is all a ploy, the whole idea that the album spills out on the Internet weeks ahead of schedule just so that Drake can give his little, boo-hoo fake whining and b*tching on to the point where we feel nothing but more support for the, now-"underdog" of the situation. Remember when I said Drake was getting too big for his britches, well doggies, sh*t looks like I was right and they went ahead and decided to flip the script on everybody. But why, why take such a huge chance by copying Lil Wayne's Tha Carter III with a leak WEEKS before your debut, Drake?
With opening day sales figures of approximately 223,000, the album sold 1,005,545 copies in its first week in the United States. With its first week sales, it is the largest first week sales for any album in 2008 in the United States and the first album to reach the million mark in one week since 5-0 Cent's The Massacre in 2005.
^ This is a numbers game, doggies, and if you haven't yet caught up to the fact that Drake/Universal realized they could take a 3:1 chance of duping Y'ALL, the doggies, and turning the most unexpected pre-planned leak into Drake's biggest first-week sales week of the year, then d*mn, y'all just aren't on my level. It makes complete sense at the end of the day. Honestly, it's a win-win when you think about it for Drake b/c no matter what it does, he can always lean on the "leak" excuse of causing him to lose out on critical sales while Universal Motown are such smart a**es that they know this kid is looking at 750K-1 million in his first week by doing this. LMFAO. F*cking rap politics. Y'all can even do the math. Carter III came out June 10th, the leak May 30th.....then you got Drake's leak on June 3rd, album comes out June 15th.....SMFH.....Thank My A** June 23rd when those numbers come in doggies. Y'all will see.
4. End Game
Instead of doing regular sh*t, I want to take this posting before we hit up "SHUT THE F*CK UP" Honors and shine a light on a very special rapper that needs a hug, Game. Yeah doggies, I didn't twitch on this NEW DELL, turns out Game is at a point in his career where we're really starting not to give a f*ck about what he says or let alone does. D*mn, how many dates have we seen for this R.E.D. Album without a REAL single? How many times did we see an ugly a** StarTrak tat on his body with no dope Neptune tracks? LMFAO @ anyone who thinks "Must Be Me" is a hood record, sh*t, I'd let my grandmamama listen to that sh*t at the gym and she is a Hector Lavoe lover, f*ck outta here. So let's try to figure out why Game has told us all about this hot a** album that is probably gonna freeze up after it gets a winter 2010 release date next. SMFH...failures beginning with and at:
Game Turns Down Lil Wayne Music Video For A Dr. Dre Record That's NEVER Coming Out: FAIL
"I flaked on the video," Game said of the track, which features Lil Wayne and Birdman. "Bird was like, 'Listen, daddy, you can come down here. Junior is gonna turn himself in next Wednesday. You can come down here. We can shoot the video before Junior go in. You just have that in the safe.' I blew it. I didn't make it down. Once he went [to jail], I was like, 'I can't use this.' I didn't want to save it, so I gave it away. That was like, 'Single!' ... I think I was in with Dr. Dre. I couldn't move," he thought back. "I think we was finishing up his records. When Dre is mixing, you don't leave. You gotta stay posted. But I couldn't move. So I gave it away. Fans appreciate it, though."
Pharrell FORCES Game To Put His Tail Between His Legs & Apologize To Jay-Z: FAIL
"Pharrell man, Pharrell pulled me to the side and he was like, 'There's only one thing that can't happen,' he said, 'you gotta stop those shots at Hov. Like, that's my man and I talk to him and he really don't understand your gripe with him, he don't have no problems with you, and I think he respects what you do and I know for a fact that you respect what he does so, you know, nip that.' And I was like, aight, that's fair. All's fair, that's it."
Game's New Album Is Officially Coming Out...NEVER: FAIL
The R.E.D. Album was originally due in stores on June 15th, but that date was changed to June 29th. The next release date given for the rapper's fourth studio album was listed as July 6th, but that date has been pushed back as well. While an exact release date has yet-to-be confirmed, the album should land in stores this Summer.
Game Forgets He LOST His Fans After Leaving G-Unot: FAIL
The rapper says he believes seniority in music equates with not having to promote upcoming projects, and that's exactly the approach he's taking for the release of his fourth studio album. "I'm not into promoting. I give you a date, and if you're a Game fan, then you'll get the album," the West Coast rapper says matter-of-factly about his upcoming album, "R.E.D.," due July 6 on Interscope Records. "I don't sell myself. This is my fourth album. I don't think I need to do all that...Generally I just wake up in the morning and I live life and I make my decisions as far as music goes based on how I'm feeling that day."
Verdict: Game is done, he really is. Maybe when he was doing the sh*t talking last summer about Jay-Z but at this point, it's a f*cking wrap. His Red Room mixtape was sh*t at best and after hearing his disappointing "400 Barz," it showed me that this clown would rather put a few disses at wack a** G-Unit before going in on Jay-Z like he should have. SMFH....do the math, he keeps selling less and less and it's now to the point that even an album leak isn't gonna help his a** from flopping. SMFH. Fail. Fail. Fail.
5. "STFU" Honors
Right on time, never late, doggies....if my clock reads correct, looks like it's time to roll out the "Shut The F*ck Up" Honors carpet and award Diddy for saying the dumbest sh*t he's said this week, laugh at Chamillionaire saying a whip is better than a house, re-visit Alfamega and his conspiracy theory, listen to Dream really compare himself to Jay-Z........wait, couldn't go forward without telling Dreamsicle SHUT THE F*CK UP!!!!! ...... and then see DJ Khaled making the worst comparison of his life.
"People have this perception of me - which is my fault - of maybe a rapper or Champagne-sipping and Hamptons and white fur and just cliche type of things that are just kind of old and dated and corny, which isn't how I am today, you know? That was just part of my image for a second. It wasn't who Sean is."
"I was always on the road touring. just didn't feel like it was a good business investment to pay that much mortgage for a house I was never at. I still got all the cars."
"You can't confront the truth, you can only accept the truth. If you don't put out a pretty lie -- if you ever done something wrong, had an argument with your friend and you wanted to apologize because you knew you were wrong, you want to apologize but don't know how to do it."
"Nope, there's not another album, this is it," Dream said in an interview with Ms. Drama. "Nobody appreciates music so I'm out. I'm out. I'm good, so take that. Like Jay said, maybe y'all will remember me when I fade to black. So it's out."
5. DJ Khaled
"This year was special because we shot the remix video of 'All I Do Is Win.' Everyone showed up, from Jada to Busta to Puff Daddy to Nicki Minaj to Fabolous to T-Pain to myself...I know it's hard to say these types of things, [but] there's only one remix video I know that's exciting like this, it's called 'Flava in Ya Ear.'"
***LMFAO!!! D*mn it feels good to see doggies up on it. F*ck it, I can't get that Kanye West "Power" out of my head, f*ck it, I'm in a GREAT mood, doggies! Who else is vibing on that record? Anyway, d*mn, I'm still taking bets on the new Drake album, money says he's NOW gonna sell between 750-800K in the first week just off this leak. No bullsh*t, as much as I hate on the frogger looking kid, he does have a good team behind him but as far as making good decisions though, he's like Jay-Z at Def Jam, sh*t, some sh*t you just can't iron out and make hot. Aight doggies, weekend time, enjoy your d*mn selves and stop whining, embrace the dissing and apply it to yourselves so I can further prove that CamronGully is really George W. Bush's niece. LMFAO. F*ck outta here, doggy! To the rest, thanks for keeping me on my 1-2, a lot of bullsh*t keeps stirring up but we're seeing right past it, ya dig? I'm outtie doggies, catch me heading back into Caption Diss and f*cking with a few comments this weekend. --BB***
[Editor's Note: The views expressed in this column do not necessarily reflect those of SOHH]