Pulse Report: Khia Slams Trina's Naked A**, Lil Wayne Beats The System, Jay-Z Puts Out A Mob Hit

Friday, Mar 5, 2010 11:45AM

Written by Bulldog Butterworth

In this week's Pulse Report, we got sh*t spread open like Rosa Acosta as we peel back the last seven days to get Khia's jealous reaction to Trina's sexy/f*cked up leaked photos, applaud Lil Wayne beating the system not once, not twice but three times, watch in awe as the "King" returns, find out who Jay-Z's new squad is and oh SOHH much more!

[Editor's Note: The views of this column do not necessarily reflect those of SOHH.com]

1. I Invented Sex

LMFAO. D*mn doggies, looks like we have ourselves a couple of b*tches (pun INTENDED) getting all hot and steamy, huh? Now this absolutely has to be a first. Trina's nude photos not only get leaked online with some weird a** Saw-voice narration last weekend but we get to hear an interview with her talking about her publicity stunt stolen lost phone containing "personal" materials AFTER they get released? LOL. Oh sh*t, now if that wasn't bad enough, it's what we saw IN that collection of photos that had me torn between throwing down my Joe Boxers and hurling over a trash can. SMFH. Let's start from square one doggies.

"I lost my phone and I had some pictures of me that I don't want the world to see," Trina said in an interview. "And I'm thinking, if it ever comes out, I'm devastated, but I mean, it's not sex tape pictures but still, I don't want you to see them, they're not for you...I don't need a sex tape of me and my, my significant other to be worldwide, for the world to see."

^ Unfortunately I kinda believe her on this sh*t, just b/c she didn't sugarcoat it and admitted to how f*cked up it would be once they leaked. But then again, when you consider it, she DOES need a sex tape for anyone to f*ck with her music again, b/c Slip-N-Slide caught an "L" when Rick Ross dipped out. Anyway, surely enough it took just a solid 24 hours before the "Baddest B*tch" addressed the foul sh*t we got exposed to:

"[The images are] me on a very upset day -- I think I was in Canada, upset crying," she explained in an interview. "Just personal stuff. Photos in the studio. I think [one] was me having an allergic reaction, breaking out. I just think it was my personal stuff and for someone to do that is so, so wrong. So now I'm actually having it looked into by the FBI and it's gonna be a bigger situation than just leaked photos."

SMFH...no disrespect, but all this bullsh*t talk about calling 9-1-1 and/or calling the Feds to get involved just sounds so f*cking retarded. Like, be honest, because this would mean the FBI is working on those Cassie, Rihanna nude pics, Lupe Fiasco's stolen music, etc...GTFOH with that, Trina. And if it wasn't bad enough she went a** out with this phone, the nastiest and dirtiest b*tch of them all decided to put a Tweet beating on Trina.

"I TOLD YALL ON THE HIT EM UP DISS THAT SHE WAS CORROTED ONE DAY YALL GONE LISTEN 2 THE QUEEN..TEAM KHIA LETS TAKE OVER WE HAVE WORK 2DO...I DONT F*CK WIT FAKES H*ES SHE CALLED I SAID H*LL NAW TRINA CALLED I SAID TRIPPLE H*LL NAW NO LETS KEEP IT 100 LOL..What In The World Is @darealkhiaTalking About Lol Dumb B*tch Go On Hurricane K-trinas Page Y R U Here??? This Is Only 4 The HealthyPeople."

SMFH.....I won't lie, female rap beef seems bogus and the fact that you would try to re-spark some old sh*t that never popped off in the past, Khia, is just a joke. But in all fairness, she was just speaking her opinion so unless Trina decides to diss her back, we'll just keep this sh*t moving b/c if y'all had to see one of 'em naked, we have a guess to who y'all would choose.

Cassie-Stolen-Pic-2010-03-04-300x300.jpgRihanna-Stolen-Pic-2010-03-04-300x300.jpg

Oopps, my bad y'all, wrong stolen pics:

Trina-2010-03-04-300x300.jpgKhia

2. All I Do Is Win

"Go-Weezy, Go-Weezy" is basically what I'm chanting these days. So yeah, I said f*ck the little Martian back in 2009, but sh*t, it's "On to the Next One" now with 2000-and-win. LMFAO. You know you're a big a** rap star when you got the f*cking New York Times covering your one-year in the can sentencing and have the whole entire world trying to get your "last" words. SMFH. D*mn, if you all weren't a fan of Lil Wayne before, then d*mn it I hope y'all are now b/c I've never seen some RAPPER beat out the court system, the NEW YORK court system at that. Turns out that little tooth problem back in "Fab-uary" was delay number one and then...wait, a f*cking blaze in the Manhattan court? Sounds like the judge wanted to see if the "Fireman" was really in the building.

Carter was scheduled to be sentenced and jailed on Tuesday afternoon, but the sentencing may be rescheduled Wednesday, according to Manhattan Supreme Court Judge Charles Solomon. The courthouse at 100 Centre Street was closed Tuesday after a fire broke out in the basement around 10:30 a.m.

SMFH. D*mn, so let's fast forward a Jay-Z Blueprint III concert here, some speculated last minute Shanell f*cking song-making there and before Wayne even kisses baby mama number 4 good-bye, Ja Rule delays the Wednesday scheduling? Well, not exactly...

"Just came from court it got postponed but my nigga weezy still free!!!," Ja wrote Wednesday morning. "I think I just broke the news lol Yes guys weezy is NOT goin in today!!!"

LMFAO! Saving y'all the trouble of reading shaded boxes, basically it turns out there was an "alleged" electrical fire and Weezy F*cking Baby gets to have one more weekend of blazin' and writing records before going into the can. Sh*t, that's impressive. Well, with my "f*ck you Wayne, gonna miss you though" out the way, let's get a few well wishes outta Diddy and Tony Yayo.

"I think we gonna miss a certain energy that Wayne has," Diddy said. "The beauty about it is, he'll be back, and hopefully he'll come back a better person. Whenever we get in trouble, we're in the public spotlight. So hopefully there's a lot of kids out there who could learn from any mistakes that we may have put ourselves in, even if we're not guilty of the crime sometimes."

DiddyTony Yayo

"Well when you go to court, that'll be his last time," Yayo told hip-hop personality DJ Vlad. "So you better boot something. Make sure you bring some weed or whatever, right? Make sure you bring your weed or your sizzurp, make sure you boot that. Cheek it. Tell him to cheek his pills, he better cheek all his drugs. He better make sure he boot, put that sh*t in his system. No h*mo, it's in you."

^ LMFAO. Yayo is such a f*cking jokester. LOL. Like the CO's won't be trying to get him so much free sh*t just to get him to autographs their kids' Carter albums. SMFH. Enough of this sappy sh*t, put this fool in the can, doggies.

3. Daddy's Home

If y'all haven't bowed down to the news of T.I. coming back home by now, well sh*t, y'all are just not hip-hop. F*ck if you're from the East, West or Mid-West, because THE SOUTH is once again on the uprise thanks to "Pimpin'." Now am I predicting a Grand Hustle takeover? Yes. Am I predicting a new T.I. album? Yes. Am I predicting Tip to start using Twitter? F*ck outta here. LMFAO.

The rapper announced new single "I'm Back" through a promotional Twitter account, and his lawyer confirmed to MTV News on Thursday (March 4) that Tip will be released from prison later this month. Federal Bureau of Prison records list the rapper's release date as March 26. "That date is correct," lawyer Steve Sadow said via e-mail. "T.I. is now serving the remainder of his sentence in home confinement under the supervision of the U.S. Bureau of Prisons."

^ My math is way off but wasn't this doggy supposed to be doing 366 days in an Arkansas jail that got infected with some bad disease? LMFAO. Sh*t, the way it's looking, Weezy might even be able to go share a pimp cup of sizzurp before he's due in to jail. LOL. Anyway, the big news here is T.I. is back and seems like this past week saw his Akoo Clothing brand go up in stock.

The billboard for AKOO -- which, incidentally, is rapper T.I.'s clothing line -- is pretty clearly suggestive of some naughty behavior (a woman sitting in front of a man ... holding onto his unbuttoned jeans ... ahem), and the reaction in Newark and the surrounding area since it went up has been pretty intense. Barry Carter for the Star-Ledger first wrote about the billboard on Sunday, calling it seemed like a specific blow to Newark, even quoting City Council President Mildred Crump as saying she was "sick of people seeing Newark as a place where they can just do whatever they want ... They think they can just put it in a black community and nobody is going to say or do anything."

LMFAO. D*mn, sex does sell, huh? Bottom line is the billboard got taken down but not without a whole sh*tload of free publicity. In all honesty, I didn't even know the "King" was making that 1999 Rocawear paper, but looks like whatever he was selling under that hustle must be doing decent if they got coverage in the north. Look, call it a bad advertisement or not, Tip still got his brand some attention and I know every money-hungry "playa" is trying to get his hands on some Akoo jeans. I mean, d*mn, if y'all had to choose.....which brand are you f*cking with?

TI-2010-03-04-300x300.jpg50 Cent

And oh yeah, and if that wasn't enough, looks like we got some Tip music coming our way too:

The imprisoned rap star's promotional Twitter account posted a message saying T.I. would have a major announcement to make on Monday, March 8. (His fiancée, Tameka "Tiny" Cottle, confirmed the Twitter account was not a personal account and that it was set up by the rapper's label, Atlantic Records.) On Wednesday, his official Web site, TrapMuzik.com, posted the artwork for T.I.'s new single, "I'm Back," urging visitors to return next week for a special premiere.

Any questions?

4. Steady Mobbin'

Now I won't yet say Jay-Z is a genius, b/c we remember that "super group" he was supposed to have back in 1998 with Ja Rule and DMX or even the hype behind "The Commission," but still, this bogus a** "Mob Squad" concept might actually have some pretty sturdy legs from what I read this week. Turns out Mr. Knowles-Carter is officially branding him, Trey Songz and the "Snowman" (Young Jeezy, fools). Sounds like Jay is beating Fabolous, Ne-Yo and Ryan Leslie to the punch. LMFAO. Let's see what Jay is saying:

"Yeah, the Mob Squad, I'm trying to put that together," Jay told radio personality Greg Street. "Trey made a song, I'm just trying to refine the hook so we can get our first song out there. I don't know if Jeezy heard it yet so I'm probably gonna surprise him with this but we got [it.] Mob Squad."

SMFH. I guess R. Kelly stan Trey was right about this collabo they've been talking about, too bad Jeezy doesn't seem to be on the ball with it. But f*ck the speculation, think about the power this threesome could have. You got Jay doing crazy a** sales, then you add Songz who is already willing to be Jay's Rell. LOL. Peep the sh*t:

"Jay-Z is one of the most influential artists in my career as well as in my life. You know, seeing him go from artist to entrepreneur to businessman to multi-business owner, and to be that close to him is amazing."

^ Uh oh, sounds like home boy might still be a little star struck, well, even his sh*t is pushing units it looks like. And even though Jay and Trey got their sh*t cranking in cash registers, Jeezy ain't ready to slow down either:

"But June, by the way," he said of the LP's release date. "That's what I'm thinking. If you the boss, you can talk like that. I'm thinking June. I wanna own the summer. If you coming out [with an album] in June, you might wanna think about that, bruh. TM103, I will be there."

So bottom line is this ain't no wack a** semi-hot crew, if Jay can play his cards right and let Jeez and Tre do their thing, Mob Squad might really be shooting up the charts.

5. "STFU Honors"

The day rappers/singers stop saying dumb a** remarks will be the day I retire "Shut The F*ck Up" Honors, b/c the amount of bogus a** statements, proclamations, predictions and disses is beyond idiotic. Some call Freeway wanting an Alicia Keys for "beautiful" music a beautiful tragedy while others could see Tony Yayo making us believe Koch would even offer him a limited one-album deal a f*cking joke. SMFH. Even Lloyd Banks, Rhymefest and T-Pain talk more "doo doo" than ever this week, peep the top five not dead but clearly alive:

Freeway

FreewayAlicia Keys

"Alicia Keys. I actually just did an unofficial remix with her for 'Try Sleeping With a Broken Heart' with DJ Benja Styles. We put it on the Internet and it's been getting a good response. She better get with it. We could make beautiful music together."

Tony Yayo

Tony Yayo50 Cent

"Would I consider signing with Koch? No," he revealed in an interview. "Because I know [5-0 Cent] would structure a better deal than Koch would give me. So I would just stay over here, you know, G-Unit's a good label."

Lloyd Banks

Lloyd-Banks-2009-12-24-300x300.jpgMr-Hanky-2010-03-04-300x300.jpg

"I'm working independent. Everything they've heard the past year has come out my basement, including 'Beamer, Benz or Bentley.' When you first come on as a new artist and you hot and you got a buzz, you could sell doo-doo on a stick."

Rhymefest

RhymefestBlogger of the Year

You figure out, all this [blogger] wanted was for someone to recognize them. Where I'm with it now, I'm a f*cking star dude. Like, I'm popular -- people want to knock you off whatever it is....artists have to keep looking straight."

T-Pain

T-Pain (Big Ass Chain)T-Pain

"Nappy Boy, it's 2000-and-win we're in right now, we're making the movement known, doing it quietly," Pain said in an interview. "Letting everybody know when we come it's gonna be a big blast, it ain't gonna be like, 'Oh they hot, oh they're getting even hotter,' it ain't gonna be like that, it's gonna be like 'Wow, they super hot!'"

***LMFAO!!! Sorry doggies, I know y'all have been sending me non-stop messages on that @BulldogButters but nothing is f*cking with my peeps in here, from disses to props, y'all show love and keep doing so. Even if I have to put some of y'all in your place and bring it back like you daddy's hairline with wise cracks, y'all know it's all bullsh*t and games. It's March doggies and 2010, step your comment game up or just shut the h*ll up! Big @JayPo, props @DrHipHop and the rest of the crew f*cking with Pulse and Cap, I see y'all! -BB***

[Editor's Note: The views expressed in this column do not necessarily reflect those of SOHH]

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