Pulse Report: Baby Ethers Jay-Z, Shyne & Lil Wayne Change Clothes, Amber Rose Saves Kanye West's Life

Friday, Oct 23, 2009 9:00PM

Written by Bulldog Butterworth

In this week's Pulse Report, we're takin' that a** back a week to peep how Baby ethered Jay-Z, learn why Shyne and Lil Wayne are trading places, watch Amber Rose save Kanye West's life, see why it's a wrap for 50 Cent and SOHH much more.

[Editor's Note: The views of this column do not necessarily reflect those of SOHH.com]

1. 40/40 Club

Birdman Baby is back at it again, he can't stay satisfied with his boy-toy Lil Wayne selling the most albums last year and having the highest grossing tour, but now he has to take it to the cyber streets on some fake a** Marlo from "The Wire" meets Nino Brown bullsh*t by going at Jay-Z because of that wack a** MTV list?

"I don't think he a number one emcee in no kinda way," Baby said in an interview. "Wayne the best he do the most and he make the most money. I don't think no n*gga in the business make more money than us. How could you be the best if you don't make the best money, the most money and you don't do the most. Lyrically, come on man be for real man can't nobody f*ck with Wayne. And to me, if you number one and you ain't getting no money it don't mean nothing. Who's making the most money. That's number one to me. F*ck all that rap sh*t. Sh*t, y'all got cold rappers you never even heard and then you got n*ggas who really can't rap and making money. It's about who's making the most money to me. I don't give a f*ck about the rest of that sh*t."

I was gonna edit the sh*t out of that rant up above, but I want you guys to actually pay attention to what this wannabe rap mogul is saying. "Lyrically, come on man" LMFAO! I'm not even gonna bother pointing out the other arguments he made. But after Weezy smacked that bald head and some time passed, Baby made sure to let everyone know he wasn't trying to beef with Hovi:

"No, no, [beef]. Nothing personal, they just asked me my opinion and that was my opinion. I think we do the most and make the most, so if you don't like it, that's on you. I can't see past Wayne, so I can't see Jay-Z."

Bottom line? Baby makes valid points when it comes to being "popular" and having "relevance" in this little thing we like to call the rap game, but f*ck outta here when he has the audacity to question Jay's lyricism or to use a lame excuse with that M.I.A.M.I. (Money Is A Major Issue) angle, 'cause doggy, we know your paper doesn't stack that high, and oh yeah, somebody needs to tell this guy that Mr. Carter spanked that Baby's a** on Forbes. And if Baby even dreamed that he had more paper than Hov, trust me, Jay would just get a loan from Oprah, SOHH stop that crying... looks like your cash cow is headed up the road anyway.

2. When I Get Free

Now before y'all go ahead and start thinking about Free in that sexy a** pose, keep in mind, we're talking about Shyne and Lil Wayne now. LOL. Now it took a long time, well, too f*cking long and turns out Diddy didn't go in interviews screaming "Free Shyne!" with borrowed 2002 Murder Inc. t-shirts, but Jamal Barrow Shyne Po is home! Well, not really. Turns out we're still kinda, sorta, what the f*ck!?!? waiting on the official word, but the latest is that the Brooklyn kid is headed to Belize:

Shyne's team is fighting to stay in the US where his mother and his grandmother live and where they raised him....but it seems like he's going to have to continue the fight from Belize. Shyne will be released from Immigration custody but will then be deported to Belize soon. He has Harvard Professor Charles Ogletree advocating on his behalf in concert with his legal team. They're still urging fans to reach out to Governor Patterson's office to petition for Shyne's pardon, but deportation is imminent.

LMFAO, y'all know I feel Shyne is the realest rapper in the game right now, but didn't I say this would happen? Regardless, all the letters in the world ain't gonna keep Shyne here at this point, this is a dirty political game and even though Puffy could have did something, Jay-Z should have stepped up and the rap game should have spoken up, it's all about politics. SOHH as Shyne grabs the sandals and "Hawaiian Sophie" shirts, turns out Lil Wayne is headed in the opposite direction:

Lil Wayne has pleaded guilty to attempted weapon possession, and expects to receive a one-year jail sentence. He previously had pleaded not guilty to illegal gun possession charges that carried at least 3 1/2 years in prison upon conviction. His trial had been due to start Jan. 20.

D*mn, now you know that's tough when the Associated Press is all up on that a**, but looks like Weezy is going to be trying to get his street credibility behind bars. Not trying to laugh at anyone who has to do time, but WTF!? You're Lil Wayne, granted, it's 2007 and you hadn't dropped Tha Carter 3 yet, but d*mn, you were on the cover of Complex, had the most anticipated album of the year and d*mn near controlled XXL Magazine covers, why do you go to NYC with a loaded grip? SMFH, let's move on before I get Dave Chappelle to school this kid.

3. Someone Please Call 9-1-1

Even though I prefer to see Amber Rose in the nude and doing photo shoots, I must say, reading some of her Tweets this week were f*cking hilarious and crazy at the same time. Now, for anyone who believed this bogus a** "hoax," if you can even call it that, about Kanye West being dead is a dumb-dumb. Let me take a guess, the same dude that started the #RIPKanyeWest trend is the one who started that beef with Fabolous as T-Pain on Twitter, right? SMFH...:

"This RIPKanyeWest topic is not funny and its NOT TRUE! He has people like myself and his family that love him very much," she wrote Wednesday morning. "Its in extreme poor taste to have that as a trendy topic. It's totally disrespectful to make up a story like this where all human and we all make mistakes and to say someone died cuz of a mistake is ridiculous. U wouldn't want someone to say that about u. Or someone u love it's not funny."

What's even worse than this earning a spot in the Pulse Report is the fact that we relied on an alleged video h*e-turned-Cassidy ex-wifey (just kidding, I love you @DaRealAmberRose) Rose to be the main news source on Ye. SMFH...don't take this the wrong way guys but just because they're f*ck buddies and are spotted at events together doesn't make her homie's number one life line. Before the sites started picking this bullsh*t up as "news" there should have been peeps reaching out to Ye's publicist, manager, f*ck it, even Consequence before Rose... D*mn, if y'all think I'm dead, please don't go to my FaceBook jump-offs to get confirmation. SMH...

4. Beginning of the End

At this point, readers are starting to think I'm an anti-50 Cent writer, when in actuality, I f*cks with 50 before he got rich and stopped tryin'. But maybe it's time for him to prove that he really is ready to redeem his rap career and get G-Unit some credible shine instead of Tony Yayo talking about ninjas and why it's "cool" to be unsigned. SMFH... so with his Before I Self Destruct album being "finished," this guy does what he thinks he does best, DISS EVERYBODY.

Talking about The Game: "Right after [his debut] was out, it was like, 'I'm hot,' because of the actual number of records he sold at that point...Game background, when you went into that, he used to be a stripper. He used to work at his mom's strip joint. So it was interesting themes that I seen from both of them but it didn't match what the content was and then I seen the transformation myself."
Going off on Fat Joe: "I knew Fat Joe's pride would bring him out first, even if he wasn't in the position to win," 50 explained in an interview. "And he would go and go and go because he has the tough-guy aura. He's tougher in his head than he is in reality, as far as his Don Cartagena sh*t is concerned. It feels great because everybody's paying attention to them and talking on the radio about them. Mind you, while they're going out and doing all of this talking, I'm just chilling. I'll send them out like they're a rap fan so they can market me.
F*cking with Rick Ross and Triple C's: "Triple Cs is next. And then Rick Ross is going to follow that failure. Def Jam dumped a whole lot of marketing dollars into trying combat me with Rick Ross. More money than they should have. What his numbers were versus what Jadakiss did, didn't make financial sense. So the next go-around, they're going to give him his fair share instead that extra piece of pie. Then you're going to see where he really is."

I'm going to save y'all the trouble of the sh*t he said about Jay-Z in that Complex interview, making Fabolous look like his "son" with MTV and the countless other sh*t he's done this week alone. However, I will point out, all those guys he mentioned have dropped an album since his self-described "dud" Curtis LP. Personally, we know Rihanna is going to destroy his sales out-sell 50, but 'til this album drops, prepare for 50 to hide his fear with more disses and clowning than ever. SMFH... Hey 50, take a cue from Jay, if we wanted the old 50, we'd listen to your old sh*t, stop with this recycled tough guy act, we don't believe you! His act is up and if when this album drops, his career will be too.

5. Fully Loaded Clip

We should have known it was going to be no time at all before Young Buck returned to this rap sh*t, but even more crazy is him talking about his ability to still sell units? LMFAO. D*mn Buck, that powder got a fella goin' crazy...:

"I'm still considered a platinum artist. My first album went beyond platinum, second one gold...At this point I wouldn't consider myself number one in the mixtape game but I would consider myself definitely in the top three..."

Yes Buck, SOHH with that dumb a** statement, we place you in the same category as Lil Flip, DMX, Chingy and Lil Jon...artists who, by YOUR standards, are "still" considered platinum artists despite going wood on their latest efforts. Uh-huh...thanks, but wait....you have more to say? Wait, G-UNIT RADIO!? Reunion?! Nah, he just wanted to make sure Eminem didn't bust off any shots to this "Soldier."

"Man, I would never diss Eminem," Buck promised. "You know what? I would never diss Eminem. I'ma be real, what had happened was I got a white producer that's from my town -- that actually produced that track. So when I went into the booth, I'm like 'Eminem, we after your a**' basically speaking on the production side of things because the producer of the track is a white dude and Eminem is his favorite and just f*cking with him. And actually, I still slam the sh*t outta his a** for keeping that sh*t on there, you feel me?

LMFAO. Ladies and gentlemen, this is what we call "trial and error" testing...see if you get a reaction, good or bad, from something and play it out. Remember 50 dissing T.I. on T.O.S? Yeah, same stunt. No Buck, you fell off harder than your motorcycle incident and taking "accidental" shots aren't the way to go.

***Once again Bulldog Butterworth lives another week and keeps y'all on your toes with the weekly wrap-up PULSE REPORT. A lot of bullsh*t going on these days in rap but I always stay strapped like Drake suggests, SOHH 'til next time, keep your eyes to the screen and let's keep this going!***

Junk Mail

BONUS: Enough

D*mn, seems like Rihanna is getting all the right publicity at just the right time. Getting ready to face-off with 50 Cent, Lady Gaga and Timbaland as Rated R gets ready to drop next month, homegirl has a new single, erotic photo shoot images spreading online and has fans ready to hear what she has to say. D*mn, my sister is gonna cop the album and say she got it for me.  That's how big this record hype is becoming. Aside from those bangin' a** photos from her shoot, she has dropped the new album's first single, "Russian Roulette."

Reaction to "Russian Roulette?" Kinda dark. The track opens with a rhythmic heartbeat, alternating, scary-movie staccato piano lines and Rihanna's breathy voice. Sample lyric: "So just pull the trigger/As my life flashes before my eyes/I'm wondering will I ever see another sunrise." It ends with a woman's drawn breath and a gun shot. This ain't your Umbrella-toting, Shia-dating Rihanna of yesteryear, folks.

It's too early to call this, but it's looking like Rihanna might easily do Beyonce-type numbers and with the media still hating on Chris Brown as he tries to swindle his way out of those Ike Turner questions, it only serves as more promotion for her. D*mn Rihanna might even help Def Jam re-up from the Jadakiss and Rick Ross promo dollars.

BONUS: Real Recognize Real

The "real" Rick Ross has been home for a minute, but has yet to dig into what type of f*ckery some of these rappers have done with his name. Well, turns out "Freeway Ricky Ross" spoke up on Freeway and Rick Ross and cleared up a lot of sh*t surrounding his issues with 'em.

"[Rapper] Freeway reached out and told me anything I needed he had me but Rick Ross, he hasn't reached out to me as of yet. That's not saying he won't reach out one day. But as of right now, he hasn't reached out...I reached out to him and spoke to him a few times and I basically was just telling him that he could be who he is. So he didn't have to use my name, he could just build a friendship with me. When I was in prison, I wanted him to start coming and seeing me, you know, just getting to know each other. And I told him he could still get his street credibility instead of doing that. We had about three conversations. When we spoke on the phone for the first three times, he paid homage and said he owed me. He told me how he first got the name and the whole nine yards."

LMFAO. Okay, not trying to defend the Miami rapper too much, but how do you say "build a friendship" from prison? F*ck outta here with that Ross. Just because he's using your name doesn't mean there is a need to be friends. You reached out to him and y'all spoke a few times? Great, but to keep that sh*t going into a relationship? D*mn, no wonder Ross got the f*ck away with having to already deal with two baby mama's and tax problems, it's no question. Stop asking for hand-outs and stick to this "reality show" you got brewing up and it seems like there could be something in the works for a Ross meets Ross setting. LOL.---Bulldog Butterworth

[Editor's Note: The views expressed in this column do not necessarily reflect those of SOHH]

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