Pulse Report: Kanye Trumped By Colbert, Jim Jones Doesn't Think "Jay-Z Is That Handsome," T.I. Thinks He Could Be The Next Jigga, & The Pimp C Award Goes To...

Friday, Dec 5, 2008 10:06AM

Written by Archie Fucque

Kanye, Pimp C

In this week's Pulse Report the streets are buzzing about Kanye West trading shots with Stephen Colbert, Jim Jones saying some super "ugly" things about Jay-Z, hip-hop celebrating Pimp C's life a year after his death, The Game laying down the law on "The Parker Report" and T.I. chopping it up with Howard Stern.

[Editor Note: The views of this column do not necessarily reflect those of SOHH.com]

1. Let's Get Ready To Humble. There's no love lost when it comes to Kanye West and the media. The Chi-town rapper has never been shy about expressing his disdain for media types. This week one of those guys struck back at Mr. West. Stephen Colbert the anchorman of Comedy Central's satirical news show "The Colbert Report" launched "Operation Humble Kanye", which calls for fans to buy his album A Colbert Christmas in order to knock West from the top of the charts.

The Colbert ReportMon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c

Of course Kanye had a counter-attack for the operation and responded from his Twitter account: "Who the f*ck is Stephen Colbert?"

Overall, the operation was a major success for Colbert as his album topped Kanye's 808s & Heartbreak on iTunes' "Top Albums" and everyone that bought it gave to a worthy cause, Feed America. Furthermore, to the surprise of many, Kanye is reportedly interested in taking a break from music to become a fashion intern. He is ready to work for free for a major designer the likes of Louis Vuitton and Raf Simons.

Now, that's one awfully humbling experience. Can you imagine an egomaniacal superstar like Kanye taking orders from a low level employee? While he seems happy, I wonder if the hiatus talk is a result of 808's not making a bigger impact first week out. I guess 450,000+ is good during a recession, but that's a 500,000 drop off from last album to now.Just something to think about.

2. The Ugly Truth. Sometimes the best part of an interview is the stuff that gets left on the cutting room floor. Thankfully Complex magazine complied the scraps from their Dec/Jan cover story with Jim Jones and we get to read some real classic zingers from the Dipset capo. As always Jimmy had much to say about arch nemesis Jay-Z, including a pointed critique of Hov's attractiveness, or lack thereof.

"Dame is a beast--when I was younger, I always admired his hustle. I can do more. I don't need to use rap as a crutch for the rest of my life. I can rap and I can do the business, I can model and do the business, I can own a production team. It's a big difference over here, [Jay-Z] can't do that. He's not that savvy, not that fly, I don't think he's that handsome. All he has is a gorgeous flow--my momma raised a gorgeous child."

Jimmy was just as straightforward talking about Jadakiss signing to Roc-a-Fella:

"I don't know, some people got to do business moves. Some people don't have enough power to do things in their own regard, so they do things to create some type of hype. Some type of niche that would reel people in to get people to look at them. I guess he felt that him doing the Roc-A-Fella thing would give him that. Me, myself, I don't think it would've given him anything whether he would've done a deal with a real label or not."

You gotta love dude's honesty.

Meanwhile, Jimmy wasn't the only one sending Jay a message on his 39th birthday. The one and old-ny Jaz-O gave Hov a gift that keeps on "dissing." [Watch here]

3. Still Pimpin. Celebrating Hov's 39th is one thing, but yesterday also marked the one anniversary Pimp C's death. It's been a year since the UGK rapper died from an accidental overdose of Promethazine/Codeine a.k.a syrup.

Pimp is definitely missed. He was the definition of Trill. Which got me to thinking, its award season so why not give out the Pimp C awards for 2008.

The "take that monkey shit back cause you embarrassing us" Award goes to Skool Boy for that utterly ridiculous Frosted Flakes chain.

frosted flakes boy

The "lookin like Larry Holmes back your b*tch ass up" Award goes to Dame Dash. A pocket full of stones. Fall back homie.

The "I don't believe you n*ggas no more" Award goes to Officer Ross and Young Buck. Don't listen to a word they say during their acceptance speech.

The "d*ck-in-the-booty-ass-n*gga" Award goes to none other than Yung Berg. No one has had a more emasculating year than this dude.

The "Trill" Lifetime Achievement Award goes to Barack Obama. Big Pimpin!

4. Chain Of Command, On a special West Coast edition of "The Parker Report," The Game, E-40 and DJ Felli Fell joined host Erik Parker to lay down the law on chain snatching. While no one on the panel had ever been a victim of a yank job, we learned that E-40 wears his "Sick Wid It" piece with "pride" and he owns a "portashade." More importantly the law of the day was "If you can't bare it, don't wear it". Check out the full show on Monday on MTV2 at 11:30.

Now there's some sound advice that Dipset underling JR Writer could have put to use this week. The Harlem rapper was reportedly gotten for his chain from thugs in the Bronx, NY. The alleged robbers made a video to flaunt their catch. [Peep here]

Writer was quick to respond with his side of the story. [Watch Here]

I'm really starting to question the point of chain snatching. A nobody stick-up kid robs a D-List rapper and that ends up giving the D-List rapper some free publicity. I think I'm done watching chain snatching videos. No more hip-hop Al Qaeda videos and the washed up rapper hocking his next mixtape in the rebuttal video.

5. Two Kings. "The King of the South" met the "King of All Media" and the encounter was hilarious as hell. T.I. stopped by "The Howard Stern Show" to talk about his chart-topping career, going to prison, his love life and more. [Listen Here]

Some of the highlight moments came when Lil' Flip's name was brought up and when Artie Lange recited Biggie's "Gimme The Loot" lyrics.

There was one quote that also stuck out to me. During the segment where Howard tells Tip he's a better rapper than Jay-Z, his response was:

"I think I have potential to be just as good if not better."

Not trying to start nothing, I know he's supposed to feel that way, every rapper should. But does he really? What brave soul is ready to argue that T.I. could one day be as good or better than Jay-Z?

Hit me up at [email protected] with your feedback on T.I. and more. Peace to my man Giuseppe Ginsberg! Thanks for getting my name out there, homie. Shalom!

[Editor's Note: The views expressed in this column do not necessarily reflect those of SOHH]

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